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So my babys dad turned up saying his gf is pregnant! I don't care what he does but I do care that he hardly sees our daughter, always puts her last and now she will be pushed even further to the side. My rey to tje news was "I pity yr gf and hope your a better dad to this one than you are to ours" he says that now he's expecting he can put bubas child support up! I thought with another baby u lose money not gain lol , he's treated our child's poor health as a joke & I'm so angry that he can't even look after the kid he has now let alone bringing another one into this world...I'm in a relationship & very happy so jealousy isn't part of this, I on fact left him coz he treated me & bubba like poo. He lives over 3 hours away so don't see how he will stick to visits with a new born (he comes to area for 3/4 days during visits) I really hope he proves he can be a good father to both children! he now thinks he can have buba over night just coz he's gunna be a dad again, he has already proved he can't look after her alone due to her poor health..I pray he doesn't leave put buba out the picture and makes the effort with her! People say this could make him a better dad, yes it could but I can't forget or forgive how bad he has treated her:(
So if he's suddenly a good dad am I ment to just forget about how crap he's been and always put her last, just sweep it under the rug? I know it's hard to judge but let's be realistic, he hardly sees her and makes no effort when he does! Now he's bringing another poor child into this world. He has been with his gf since December so it's not even serious! he will be with this new baby all the time so of course I'm wary that he will just not both with ours ESP as there is a huge living distance!
Hello Tinkerbell2
What a shock for you! I know you are not jealous for yourself but it is understandable to feel some resentment that your own daugher will be pushed even further into the background.
I suppose we could say that EITHER having more hands-on involvement with a new baby will develop some decent parenting skills in him and then at least you can feel a little more comfortable that he will keep your daughter safe OR he will become even more distant from your own child and while this would be sad for her, at least you would not have the worry that you have been through in recent months. Only time will tell.
He's a vile man and an even worse father but always comes up smelling of roses......Im a single mother, doing it all by myself (bf not included) & would love more kids but always get shit on.....seems you only get the good things in life if u r a bad person :(
Hi Tinkerbell2, I used to believe as you do, however what goes around comes around. So even though my ex seems to live the life of riley, I imagine he has no peace in his life. Whereas I and my daughter live a content and peaceful life 
I can understand the shock that you are feeling, it seems that some people are quite happy to make babies left right and centre without the realisation of what the 'whole' deal entails.
You aks whether you have to sweep all his poor behaviour under the carpet. Well to be honest, I think if he can start to prove himself, you won't need to raise previous issues. Don't question yourself, know in your heart that you have your daughters best interests at heart and will always put her first.
Have you and your boyfriend considered having children? How long have you been together?
We have not being together long enough to have children and I would rather focus on my buba before I bring another child into this world. In the future I would love another baby but my buba is still very young and unlike my ex I'm not willing to have kids left right and centre. As I said what he does is his own business, he can have 20 kids for all I care but he must remember he DOES already have one and I'm not willing to let her be tossed aside. He should of developed a relationship & parenting skills with this one first before bringing another child into the world. If anything I pity his new gf as I know he's a crap bf and father but she still has to learn this...my daughter is my only concern and I hate to prodict the future but I know him better than any1 and sadly he always proves that my predictions are right
Ive tried so hard for buba to have a relationship with her father, I've let him stay over night, taken them out, keep him updated with everything, suggested we all go to a parenting class but he has basically rejected it all so now I give up. Im hurt by the baby bombshell but im hurt for buba not for me...I've tried all I can and I'm not willing to anymore- the ball is in his court, if his visits fade out I will not try contacting him and my daughter will always know she is loved.
Hi Tinkerbell2, you have done everything you could have done. It is his responsibility to keep the contact up. As the saying goes You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink it!
Your daughter is still very young so wouldn't feel the wrench of losing her dad, if the contact did fade. And although we feel hurt for our children and think they are missing out if they don't have their father in their lives, we need to remember that 'They won't miss what they don't know', they might fantasize occassionally, but as long as we can take care of all their emotional needs, they will be fine 
Living so far away, he will have to put a lot of effort into contact.
You're right when you say that the child support will go down if it goes through the CSA, once the baby is born.
You can't make him be a good father though, and your daughter is young enough to not be affected by any of this.
On the other hand, it could make him a better father. Only time holds the answer to that one...