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Sorry guys but this is a bit of a rant...
I have just dropped angel off at Brownies and the Brownie leader has really annoyed me! There is a 3 - night 4-day holiday for the Brownies coming up and I (easily) decided angel is not going. In my eyes she is too young to be away from me and I am not comfortable with her being with strangers I dot know 2 1/2 hours drive away. I admit I am a very overprotective mum but that is how I am and it suits me.
When I dropped angel off all the other mums were paying the money for the trip and the leader asked me is angel going and I said no, I just feel she is still a bit too young and she has never been away from me before. The leader then felt it was entirely appropriate to shout out "oh dont be silly she will be fine, all the kids are going" and then proceeded to tell the other mums to "sort me out" and convince me she should go! I was fuming as 3 of the mums literally cornered me asking me "what are you worried about" "do you think we'd let ours go if it weren't safe" etc.
Truth is I dont care what other parents do or dont do with their kids but with my child I need to know where she is and feel she is safest when I am watching her. To make it worse by time I left angel was crying because all the other kids are going and now she thinks her mum is 'silly'.... So angry!!!!!!!
Thanks Sparkling x
I know that the kids love these camps and can be a great benefit to them but for me personally I feel 8 is a bit too young ( i was 13 before I was allowed to sleepover at a friends!). I know others disagree and that is fine but I would not rest for a second if she was away with people I dont know.
I am just annoyed the leader made an issue of it in front of everyone including the children. She could have pulled me aside and tried to reassure me and that would be fare enough, but my mind wont be changed on this one. I have already explained to angel she can go on a trip when she is in guides and a bit older and she was ok with this until now.
She'll be ok by the morning... They soon get over things at that age 
I think every parent and every child is different. My eldest went to France on a student exchange when he was 9. This was fine for him (he was confident and not worried and sleepovers is something we started around the age of 5), but not so much for the French boy that came and stayed with us and cried so much the afternoon he arrived. (Luckily I speak French, that helped!).
If you sat little angel down and told her what you think and how old you were she might understand a bit better? You could tell her that if she went and suddenly needed you for whatever reason, it would be almost impossible for you to get to her, and does she really want that.
I have to admit that I have encouraged independence in my lot from a very early age (but then I now have problems with one of them trying to be too independent, so I'm not saying I have it all right), and I have been pushy towards other parents when I've felt them to be overprotective. 
Good for you though, that you stand your ground because it means you are sure in yourself you are doing the right thing. Bad of the scout leader, understandable from the other parents I'd say. Little angel will be fine!
Hi little angel, sounds like the leader handled it in totally the wrong way! If we have strong feelings about something, there is nothing worse than them just being dismissed, which is what she did. See this for the silly mistake it was.
Hopeful is right, every child is different. My eldest really struggled with being away from me, he went on a weekend Cub camp but I was called to pick him up the next day as he had not slept. This was not too long after his dad and I split up and I think he thought he had to "look after" me. Youngest was better, still glad to be home but coped ok while away.
Sounds like you made the right decisoon, four days is rather a long time for a first trip, you need to build up to things. Just to say, however, most year 6 children apppear to have a school week away (4 nights) on an activities week so if angel's school does this then it is definitely a good idea to think about helping her to build up to this. I know she stays with your mum sometimes. Could she branch out a little further with going on a sleepover with a friend? I totally understand the issue is that if she is far away you can't get to her, I used to feel the same (still do if eldest is ill and he is 23!!) Yet another nerve-racking aspect of being a parent
Thanks Guys,
I will be first to admit this is probably less of a 'child' issue and more of a 'parent' issue in that it is me who has the anxiety mostly on being separated but I really dont feel that it will have any detrimental effect on angel not to go on a trip at her age. The whole concept of being apart from your parents so young is alien to me as I never spent a night away from my mum as a child.
Angel, however does got to sleepovers now after I came to terms with it. I think it is me who will need to build up to the idea of angel going away with school in year 6 as I really would not be comfortable with that at this stage.
Luckily angel is ok with missing the trip now as we have arranged our own family trip at the same time.
Good plan, little angel. I am glad to hear she is going on sleepovers, I guess the next stage is to leave her overnight with someone trusted, eg your mum and you go somewhere that is a little distance away?
Thanks Louise. I think that would take some building up to aswell. Being too far away is quite difficult for me because the way my anxiety works means I have to have a fast exit strategy at all times to be able to get to her in an emergency. Obviously I have the added issue of her dad and his threats to 'kidnap' her so I am probably much more anxious than a normal person.
It is a bit crazy but I have lived like this for 6 years so it will take some work to start to relax especially as her dad is still out there....
Yes, I totally understand that. I don't think the anxiety ever totally goes away. My youngest (18!!!!!!) went bowling the other week and his friend was driving, I know this boy is a good driver but as he went out the door he said "ooh I have never driven to York before and I don't much like driving in the dark" I proceeded to have (metphorical) kittens for four hours until he got back ok.
And the track record of angel's dad has made things harder. It's a pity you have had some not very good experiences with counsellors as it is the sort of thing they could help with.
Loads of hugs. I do understand...
I've taken Cubs to camp a few times and they absolutely love it. And seen the Mum's breaking their hearts leaving them.
I broke my heart when my lot went on camps, and even now they're more or less grown up, they still talk about them.
Perhaps you could volunteer to help so you could go with them in the summer perhaps? It happens in our group and can work well...
Just a thought.