Hey all,
Just found out that my ex is about to start work so after almost a year of me paying for everything, i'm kind of looking forward to getting some cash off her for my kids..... or at least one, the other is coming up on 16 and has autism, learning difficulties, epilepsy etc etc, When i mentioned to the ex that it would cost her around 20% of her income she sneered at me and said, well, not for long because "Child A" is 16 soon..... that really got me pissed, it got me even more riled when she said "why do you think i haven't bothered getting a job yet?!" Arrrrggggh..... it's so infuriating!!!!
Anyway, after a bit of a think, i wondered if it's possible to get a court order to make her liable to pay til my daughter is 18? She'll never leave home and requires constant supervision so i'm unlikely to be able to work again :'( In the meantime the ex is swanning off to Gracelands.........
Cheers
How nice for your ex... 
As long as your daughter is in receipt of child benefit, then maintenance will be payable.
While it was about four years ago, my ex managed to get married in New England 
Can't afford birthday cards mind.
I'll never understand how a parent can choose not to be responsible.
Hey Louise and Sparklinglime, had this reply back from the legal expert
"Child Maintenance is assessed by the CSA - if your children are under 18 years then their Mother is obliged to pay maintenance . For 2 children it is assessed at 20% of her net monthly income . If they stay overnight with her then the amount is reduced by 1/7 for each night of the week they stay with her .
I suggest that you contact the CSA in order for them to undertake an assessment . They can ensure the maintenance is deducted directly from her wages .
You may also be entitled to Spousal Maintenance , that is additional maintenance for you from her . In order to assess this you should try and see a Solicitor who specialises in Family Law ."
While not particularly helpful, it did throw up Spousal Maintenance which is something i was unaware of..... Not really sure if i should try for this, i'd never hear the last of it from her family and friends......... plus she'd use it as an excuse to see the kids even less than she does now, that would be her way of getting back at me i suspect because she knows that i find it incredibly difficult to deal with my daughter during school holidays.
Thanks for that, Liquid_Xi
Spousal maintenance.......you know when you hear in the media of celebrities getting divorced and they have either no children or adult children, and then the item will say what the payout has been to the divorced spouse, well that can be spousal maintenance. It is quite unusual in the case of more ordinary people like us (although it used to be provided for women in the days when women were not regarded as equals who could have careers)
Child Maintenance through the CSA is only payable past the age of 16 if the child is in full-time education though....what is the situation with your daughter?
I should have spousal maintenance - £1 a year. So far he owes me £8
well that's £8 more than i've had lolololol
I've not had it yet... :-))
Hey Louise,
because of the complex needs of my daughter, she could be in full time eduction upto 25, certainly she'll be in her current school until she's 18.
With regard to spousal maintenance, i thnk it's something that i may have a stab at, after all, i'm highly unlikely to work again because of the needs of my daughter, so why shouldn't she pay? Only problem is finding a family law solicitor that does legal aid the way the government keeps slicing into the legal aid budget.......
Are you receiving Carer's allowance for caring for your daughter?
My son was receiving DLA for a while before I realised that I could claim it.
nice to be owed it though :-D
yes, had a really good social worker when she was first diagnosed about 12 years ago. She was real hot on benefits. Unlike the current one that is a complete waste of space.
Hi Liquid-Xi
You may as well try and claim everything you can, you deserve it as you are doing a sterling job with your daughter and it is certainly not easy.
To find a Legal Aid solicitor near you, try this Legal Aid Finder.
Family Fund are brilliant too - which I'm sure your social worker would have advised you about.
None of it is easy, as Anna says.
Thanks Anna 
Yes, they've been brill, if it weren't for them i wouldn't have a holiday since i finished work in 2000 :-( I'd love to go back to work but there's just no way it'd happen. If i was able to work from home then maybe yeah........
My son's issues are not as difficult as those you face, but I've been lucky in that I work for friends. I can pick up my keys and leave when ever I need to, or not go in at all (well, most of the time!). I can work from home too.
I'd love a brainwave where I could set up a business that would work for him too. Oh to be clever...!
ah, that'd be ace for me..... I've been involved in the music industry since i was 15, now i just spend any freetime i get creating "music and video mash ups" helps to keep the mind sharp...... Just feels like such a waste...... :'(
Someone I know through Scouts does sound engineering.
He's doing a lot of work for his local theatre group and with the local radio station - streaming online rather than 'proper' radio.
Just wondering if there's something similar that might keep your creativity creating?
well had almost 30 years in as a DJ, i enjoy what i do but can't even post it up anywhere now without the almighty copyright theft charge clawing at your door......... stupidity - it's free advertising after all!
Hello Liquid-Xi
If your daughter is not in fulltime education after the age of 16 then the "system" regards her as an adult in terms of her "own" Disability Living Allowance etc. so I am not sure whether an order can be put in place.
Please email our Legal Expert with this question, I will be very interested in the answer!