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Hi everyone,
I split from my husband two and a half years ago, I filed for divorce on grounds of adultery a few months later. We are still not divorced, the decree nisi was issued last March and then eveything was on hold until we sold our house, which took 16 months to sell.
Unfortunately we had to drop the price a lot to sell the house and there wasnt a lot left over once everything had been paid off. This money has been sat with my solicitor since the house sale completed. We were waiting to get our pension values through, I work for the NHS and my ex is in the forces so both have fairly good pensions. My solicitor advised that we got the pension cash values before making any decisions. We now have these values and his pension is significantly higher than mine, however my solicitor has suggested that we leave the pensions but that I get the majority of the house money. My ex has provisionally agreed that he will agree to a 75/25 split of the money in my favour.
I just want the whole divorce over now as he has been very difficult about a lot of things. I guess I am just wandering whether I am making the right decision in not looking at a pension sharing order and just wondered whether anyone had any experience of this?
Thanks, Sam
Thanks for your reply Louise. It is just useful to hear of others experiences. I havce e mailed my solicitor today saying that I agree to a 75/25 split. A few people have said to me that i should try and fight for the pension but as you say I do have my own and I just want the whole thing over now! Guess I will just have to wait and see what happens now!
Good luck Sam.W, only you know what is right for you, you say that you just want this over and dealt with now, so fingers crossed. 
Hi SamW
I am not a lawyer but when I got divorced I got a 75% share of the house and this was considered a very good settlement for me (this was before the law changed to take account of pensions) We had offered my ex husband 70-30 before court as we thought that was reasonable as I had the children and they were eight and three. Obviously you must be guided by your solicitor but I would have thought that what he is suggesting sounds very sensible, not least because it is less hassle, plus you do have your own pension as well. Do make sure that the children's dad is paying a fair amount of support, though. If he has no other children to support then for your two he should be paying about 20% of his gross salaryand if he is not, now is the time to negotiate this!!!