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My name is Abigail and I am a writer at The Times working on a feature about unwed mums. I am looking for approximately 6 women who will be willing to share their story, whatever that may be...single, with a partner but unmarried, planned or accidental pregnancy. The only box that needs to be ticked is that your children were born out of wedlock (no engaged women please).
The idea for this piece orginates from recent statistics showing that number of unwwed women having children is almost the same as the number of married women having children. We want to run a piece looking at all the reasons why this is happening. Is it because having a child out of wedlock is no longer taboo as it once was? Is it because people have stopped believing in the institution of marriage? Is it because women today feel more confident in raising a child alone? Is it all or none of these reasons?
We want to hear several stories in attempt to shed light on this issue. Hence why I'm not looking for one particular type of unwed mother. We want to hear as many stories as possible so anyone who is keen to share their story please do get in touch.
Again, if you just want to chat it through at first that is no problem. Feel free to call me on 020 7782 5954.
Thanks for clarifying, what does everyone think? Did you never marry before having children? Did you have children and then get married? Do you believe in marriage?
HI there... I am often suspiscious of 'media' reports on single parents, especially single mothers, as I think most news papers have at some time or other painted derogatory images of single mothers for many years.. hence why putting many on the Work Programme with sanctions applied has become acceptable to the public.
Hi Anna,
For me personally I see marriage as a religious institution. It was something created in order for couple to reproduce without sin. As I am not religious I see no reason to ever marry. I see the biggest committment you can make is having a child together. I am not against marriage though and I know many people dream of it from a young age but it just isnt for me, it makes breaking up with someone much more difficult and expensive! (My mum never married so maybe that forms my view, but I know my mum would love to marry)
My only gripe is how the government tries to coerce people in to getting married with this 'big society' stuff. I dont think the government should be having any dealings with our personal relationships. I am not going to get married just so I can receive some extra tax breaks etc. The stigma they are trying to reproduce about unmarried couples is out of order.
As a Tory paper The Times.... I wouldn't give any reporter for them the time of day. No doubt it will be twisted. Can just see the headline.... Feckless Single Mothers Breeding Like Dogs In A Puppy Farm.
Hahaha Great minds think alike Helly! Because contrary to most of the media beliefs we DO have minds of our own that we dare to use! 
Perhaps Abigail could turn this research on its head and request information from men who choose to
a) Decide to turn on their heels after being told they are going to be a Daddy.
b) Who force an ultimatum on a woman, have an abortion or they leave.
I think going after the 'soft touch'- the woman its another Single Mother bashing piece, possibly
used by this coalition to use as a beating stick, as if we're not being beaten enough.
My best friends Sister in Law writes for the Daily Mail and I know eaxctly what she thinks of the Single Mothers.
Spot on Helly! Or what about the many men who beat and abuse women? Statstics show that 1 in 4 women are abused by men... but of course according to the likes of the Daily Mail single parents are all "yea but, no but" types in shell suits living it large on benefits!
Propoganda against single parents? I had been wondering for years why such an unfair and untrue image has been painted of single mothers in particular (and disabled people on benefits) and now the Work Programme Slave labour scheme with sanctions has been pushed through I totally understand! Mind prepping the masses with propoganda & lies creates a dumbed down complacent acceptance thus removing the voice of single parents being taken seriously at all. After all this is the same government and media that feels it right and fitting for terminally ill people to be placed on the Work Programme too (many of whome are single parents also) .. unless they have 6 months to live of course... so the opinions of single parents is worthless to these vultures if they don't even consider sick and dying people!
There is a good video on YouTube .. type in 'who ownes the media' ... then have a look at many of the companies who are entering into the Work Programme and using slave labour. One perfect example if the ties A4E has in Palestine with their branch called Amin.
Single parents are just one group of exploited people who are degraded in the media.
Sorry for the rant but enough is enough!
I'm sure Abigail is aware of the term 'Social Engineering'....
Ami I didn't want to be a Single Mum as I'm you didn't either. My ex is Prfessional PGA Golf Player and Pro Teacher too, yet somehow he manages to massage the books and show he only earns...get this £50 per week!!! So after the CSA have taken into account his subsequent children he now has to his new Wife it translats into zero. Err hold on what about his first born Son.
Hope you're having a good day so far?
;o)
It is disgusting how men get off scott free .. even single parent men are given more respect than we women. Don't get me wrong, I do admire and respect them myself, but are they ever painted as "yea but, no but" scallies? When people thinks 'single parent' they think women and therefore derogatory images are subconsciously tapped into the masses mind like a slow dripping tap.
My father had cancer (I looked after both my parents for years) and I was told he had died when they were wheeling me down to the delivery room! (Why they couldn't wait until after I don't know?) However my ex left me and my little girl totally alone when she was 4 weeks old when I was still grieving for both my parents (my mother died the year befor) He then went onto uni several times until he got his pHd and a big fat wage, while I was left on benefits instead of starting my own business whichis what I had been working very hard towards. He didn't see her until she was almost 3 years old. Credit where its due is is now very good to her although hardly sees her, but treats me with utter contempt.
Got a call from a job I applied for, it was an agency (as usual) and he said he would pass my cv onto the company and get back to me to arrange an interview... so fingers and toes all crossed that something comes of it!
How is things with you .. I have to say I am absolutely made up that I met you here, you're a top individual and very like minded!! Tons of respect xoxoxox
Hello guys, very interesting debate, keep it coming. Whilst I agree that single dads do not have the same "stigma" to carry around, they face different problems as our dads on here will tell you. Everything from not really being trusted to look after children, to services being designed for mums rather than "parents" I also know of several dads without the majority day to day care who have been plunged into hardship by paying their child support whilst the mum of the child has remarried and is living the life of Riley.
But yes, the media stereotype of the "single mum" is not only derogatory, it is untrue!
Hi Abigail, what will the essence of the article be?