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My 2 year old will be meeting her younger half sibling for the 1st time in a few weeks.
i suggested it as i onow it will happen sooner or later. Im making a long drive up to them which i dont mind as their father doesnt drive however Ive heen messaging the other mother and I just dont know if we will click as in her messages she made stupid inmature comments about my daughters bad health and even though not medical trained what so ever thinks shes a know it all.
i know im not there to be mates with her as its all about the girls but cant bite my tounge esp when it comes down to my own child.
due to the long distance between the siblings they will prob hardly ever meet but making the effort this once as they are related by blood.
Has anyone else been in this situation.
I have to go along as father isnt allowed our child alone due to past situations
I never got to meet my half siblings so feel A should meet hers even if only once or twice.
As for the Girlfriend, Id never have a row but I would tell her she doesnt have a clue what shes talking about.
Im just not sure how much info to give about my life to the mother, wether to answer questions honestly about what hes like as a father to A (she asked via txt but I ignored it) as I know he lies to people making out hes the best- do I just say nothing or tell the truth in a nice way.
Hi Tinkerbell
I would think you just have to go along with your best judgement of the situation at the time, you don't have to tell her anything you don't want to about yourself and A, as for info about dad if asked i would just stick to facts.
Has he had contact with A's sibling?
YEs he lives with the sibling and girlfriend, however girlfriend told me he isnt much of a hands on dad to sibling either.
he will also be attending siblings meeting
I think what Sally said is a good idea, play it by ear at the time, you don't need to volunteer any information about him as a dad but if she asks you can answer honestly. Don't worry too much if the meeting isn't brilliant as A is only little, but at least you will have made the effort and made some contact.
Thats exactly what i keep saying- even if its only this one meeting at least A will grow up knowing I made the effort for her :D
It will be worth the effort in years to come 
I'm in a similar postion but with a soon to be born. My kids want to know their half sibling. Both their dad and the GF say they want that too( not convinced it'll be that easy) I don't know if they have any rights but if it's what they want I'll fight to the death for them to see that child!
I dont believe there is any rights regarding half siblings meeting as its up to all bio parents involved and technically thet are not full blood.( as cruel as that sounds).
ive only made the choice as I know its going to happen sooner or later and would rather get it out the way while they are both young.
i think a new born may be a bit to young and isnt going to understand anything.
how is your relationship with the ex and girlfriend?
Exactly why I want it to happen quickly. I don't want anyone to be messed up or hurt over this. Yeah I have an alright relationship with them, I mean he winds me up but I guess thats natural. She is nice and I believe her when she says its what she wants too. Shes a first time mum so I don't think she realises that the day that baby is born, she will change forever. Her attitude may change when she has her own child to protect.
...or then again she may understand much better where you are coming from regarding your own two? Parenthood does change us forever, you're right 
Ive never met my exs girlfriend so will be a first meeting for all.
The only reason im abit nervious about the meeting is because my ex does not have a good record with girlfriends , they didnt really know each other before she fell pregnant, and hes the kind of guy who will get loads of different girls pregnant so I dont want my one to end up meeting loads of different woman and children.
The mothers attitude may not change but no doubt she will be more wary and may wise to put the meeting off for a bit, as a new mother we all know how crazy and bust everything gets so throwing other children into the mix may be abit to much at the moment.
My son met his half sister, but he as much older than your daughter. Think he was 7. The mother and I had spoken over the phone and I travelled on coach for four hours. To stay with them. The father wasn't involved with either children. Unfortunately, although the visit went okay, the mother and family had lots of problems, and as much as I wanted to help, I was being dragged down. I broke contact, but the main thing is the children met, and if they wish, they can have contact when they are older.
Good luck with the visit.
This new girl got pregnant straight away, ordinarily I wouldn't let her anywhere near them but the baby changes things. My kids have met her and really like her. They're trying to make a go of things and seem happy. She is making an effort with them and makes sure I'm happy every step of the way. Deep down I believe she'll be good to them and let them be in the baby's life no matter what but I still have that niggling doubt.
The baby is a different matter because this is all it'll ever know. It will be born having a half brother and sister. My kids will have to adjust. Change is hard but they're coping so well so far. I can only hope they do when the baby arrivves.
Children are generally very resilient and flexible and it is we adults who can struggle at times.
You will have to see if the girlfriend goes through with it all, Tinkerbell2
Very true. We spend our lives worrying about how things will affect them and they just seem to rally on through. It's the long term effects though - my ex never really got over his dad leaving when he was a teenager. Although I do think it's because he never really talked it through. As long as they know they can share any fears or concerns I reckon they'll be ok!
Yep, totally agree
So the meeting is this week Eek- however myself and the gf have been messaging (i dont think shes told my ex) and I must say we clicked straight away, shes even opened up to me about her relationship with my ex which was slightly weird but I think she just wants advice as shes realising what hes like & obv ive been in that boat.
Im not taking it all to seriously as its not my place to get involved but glad she seems nice :)
Ah yes, Tinkerbell2, you are very wise, I know you have your head screwed on, heh heh 
Good luck with the meeting and let us know how things go
Traveled over 3 hours with A still being slightly poorly from asthma attack last week and on antibiotics just for her father to sit there with both his girls like a sack of s**t and not talking or interacting with either child.
well I gave him a piece of my mind after via text saying he made no effort like always considering this could be the 1st and last time the half siblings meet and his excuse was he felt ill. Haha the cheek of it after A is much worse and still made an effort.
luckily his parnter is lovely and we chatted for ages, mainly her slagging him off behind his back.
A didnt seem to fussed about her half sibling and got very jealous when she wanted to sit on my lap but I of course expect this from a toddler.
lets just say I will NEVER make that kind of effort for him as long as im breathing but glad A met her half sis :)
Well done, Tinkerbell, for getting through this, and at least you know you made the effort and you liked the be partner!!!!
Ok so the girlfriend is sending A a pressie- its a picture of A's half sibling. Really lovely thought but dont really wanna be displaying a picture of my exs other child in my living room and myself and A share a bedroom so was thinking to keep it in storage until she has her own room. I feel im going to have to tell As father this incase he comes to my home and thinks ive just dismissed the photo all together- how do I put it nicely to him?
I think you might be overthinking this a bit my lovely :-)
I would put it in a special box under As bed where she can put precious things until she has a room of her own.
If he mentions it ever, which I seriously doubt as he is a man after all :-), just say it's in the bedroom.
You could also thank them for the photo so they know you appreciated it.
x
I agree with GEM, you could make a special "memory box" for A
My ex got me a photi frame last year that didnt match any of my futnitire colours then asked why it wasnt up so im guessing he will ask.
Of course I thanked them for the photo (which im still waiting to recieve) what person wouldnt, its still a gift after all hahaha.
I dont think I will be putting it in a memory box just yet as A is only 2 and tends to distroy everything in her path- 2 year olds and glass do not mix (the joys on toddlers ha) .
So im thinking maybe in a draw and let A know where it is so she can ask when she wants to view it or when I mention her half sibling I can get it out :)
Hi Tinkerbell2 that's a great alternative, my children all have their own photo album which they can stick pictures of people that are special to them in, my youngest has her baby scan picture and a picture of her when she was born, aswell as pictures of her half siblings and the siblings other siblings that are not related to her at all.
Wow Sally that last line shocked me completely (half siblings other siblings not related)
Good on you for being so open minded :D :D
Yes I was thinking the memory box would have to be put somewhere safe
Families are very wide-ranging these days and blended families with step-children very common so I guess we need to think in these terms.
This is going to sound so stupid but need to get it out my system.
My exs new girlfriend suggested As half sibling buy A a xmas pressie. As many would I felt I had to buy the sibling one in return from A. I gave the pressie to As father for his other daughter but YET to recieve one in return. I feel the mother has just ponce d a free gift full well knowing she wasnt going to do it in return EVEN thou it was HER idea.
I know it sounds petty but its the principal especially when I wasnt keen on the idea to begin with & even if she gives one, Xmas is over with and its almost February! !!!
Try not to let it bother you. Easier said then done I know. You did the right thing. You can look at yourself in the mirror and hold your head high. Can they? I bought a gift for the ex s baby but it was a gesture for my kids more than anything so they know I tried and that there's no bad feeling on my part.
Im hoping they are not expecting gifts this christmas from me too haha
Well it's a bit early to worry about that. All you can do is try and do right by your child. You can grin and bear it because you know that's what it's all about.
Hi Tinkerbell2,
I hear how frustrated you are that no matter how hard you try to do the right thing, the other people involved just don't seem to play the game. Luckily, A is too little to be hurt by the lack of prezzie. If you have a suggestion next year about a gift, rather than saying "no, because you didn't bother to send one to A last year", maybe you could just say "no, that all feels too awkward, let's wait till the children are older"
I think they are a joke.
Its bad enough her father and all his family let A down but for his girlfriend to now do it too is no way being allowered. Who the F does the think she is!!
I made it clear to As father today that presents will no longer be happening from my side and to be honest he didnt really seem to care- they are just both out for all they can get . If they think they can ponce off me like As father use too tjey can think again
At least now they know where they stand, Tinkerbell. You did your best and that's that. Good for you!
That's it. You did what you thought was right. They didn't play ball. You're in the right. You've made your feelings clear. Now forget it and move on
Thanks ladies. Really had to get that out my system.
Completly moving on from it & want to leave that suject in the past otherwise it would eat away at me. At least i know i can hold my head high.
Thanks again
Too right. That's exactly how to handle it. Well done
Tinkerbell2, yet again I have to take my hat off to you that you do so much for your little one even though you have not had any help or co-operation from her dad. I have not been in the situation and maybe others can be more helpful than me but I do agree with you, it is about the girls. However, I also think it gives you a chance, as A's mum, to suss the situation out a bit. With her having health problems, you need to know what the set-up is in case there is future contact, you never know how these things will pan out. Do bite your tongue though, remarks are made out of lack of knowledge and you know your own child best...and having a row in front of her isn't a good thing anyway.
Let's hope others can share their own experiences of this, to give you a better picture.