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a few weeks ago i started seeing a new man called J. FIST MAN IN 3 YEARS. Anyway he is my man friends brother and i didnt know untill a few days after the first date. i only ever met the eldest brother. Me and J got on so so well, he was perfect and he made everything perfect. i felt like a teenager all over again and my head was spinning. He told me i was beautiful and that he would do anything to keep me happy. the next day I started to feel bad because he is my friends brother and asked if he had told his brother about us and he said he had and that his brother was cool about it. Anyway J is now on holiday and isnt due back for a week but my phone started to play up and i lost his number so i sent a text to his brother asking for it. His brother (my friend) started to freak out and went mental. He was calling me all sorts of names and said that i was lieing about seeing his brother and that i would never come between them (thats not what i was doing at all) I sent a message to J on fb asking why he had lied and said he had told his brother about us. So far no reply off J but my friend sent me a message saying i was a child and that i never ment anything to him and he never cared about me as a friend. It turns out J's phone is still here i England so his number is no good to me anyway. But i have now lost an amazing friend and J is going to come home to a brother who wants him dead and he wont want to see me anymore. So i have lost him too. I dont understand why he didnt tell his brother about us and i dont understand why my friend is saying things like he never cared about me and stuff. Im just really hurt and dont know what to do. I really cant explaine how badly he has hurt me.
Hello LolaAnnMitzy
Poor you!
You have done all you can, you sent messages and people have not told you the truth. That hurts, I know. As for why they have behaved like that we may never know or understand. Now you just have to sit back from the situation and let people stew in their own juice. This guy is not a genuine friend if he says things like that about you and maybe you will get an explanation from J, maybe you won't. If he turns out to be not all you thought then I am glad that you found out in the early stages of things.
Pick yourself up, dust yourself down and tell yourself you are worthy of being treated with respect and kindness!!!!
Here here Louise!
LolaAnnMitzy - do not get into this, yes, it hurts, but actually they are both treating you badly.
Your friend by saying these nasty things. He may be angry, but that is not excuse for name calling.
J has lied to you and his brother, not a good sign for a healthy relationship.
You are better than all of this.
J made you feel great, however you need to find that within yourself, as I believe, a partner is not put on this earth to make us feel good, that is our job, a partner is for sharing our life with. And if we are not happy on our own, why would someone want to be with us?
hello im new to this.
iv split from this guy, second attempt at the relationship. it all came to an end through the fact of i tried talking to him bout how i were feeling with in the relationship.. soon to find out that he aint a big talker and blew it out of proportion. he has tried finding every opportunity to contact me, from me putting how i were feeling on my status on fb. to me i cant not express how i feel do not like to bottle things up. well since then, i expressed my feelings on a photo, basically saying how he made me feel. i probably in some way shouldnt of put it. he is taking it to another level, trying to get to me. i dont know what to do. i just want me and my daughter to be free of him..
advice would be great :/
Hello fio revilo
You say he is "trying to get to you", I wonder if you could say a bit more about this. Is he threatening you? There are some simple things you can do such as block him on your Facebook and get a new SIM card for your phone so that you restrict the contact he has with you.
How is it affecting your daughter?
Hi Lola Ann Mitzy. It is rather confusing isn't it. I don't understand either what the problem is with you seeing your friend's brother, unless of course the friend has feelings for you, which he has never mentioned??? Even if that was the case, it still isn't a reason to treat you the way he is doing. As for J, I don't know why he hasn't been in touch with you. I guess you could just write this off as a bad experience, even though it's upsetting for you. Yes it's nice to feel loved, told your beautiful etc etc, but as you've only known J for a few weeks, he's not worth worrying about in my opinion.