Hello there, I'm Pip, I'm in my 40's with 2 kids, a 16 year old girl and a 7 year old boy, been separated for 4 years. Kids and I live in East Anglia - no pets :)
I'm so glad to have come across this site, I don't want to be depressing so I won't but suffice is to say it's hard and no-one (apart from those in the same situation) actually understands. Thanks for your welcome.
I (and kids) would really love a dog but got my hands full!
Hello ms_pip
Welcome to One Space and I hope you soon feel at home here, I know what you mean about the hands-full thing, I always found my goldfish to be too much responsibility 
There are lots of single parents on here who will be able to share experiences with you and all at different stages as well, which is great.....our own little community.
Do you work outside the home at the moment? Do the children see their dad much?
I know where you're coming from when it comes to understanding...
Hi Louise,
Yes I work outside the home, it's extremely demanding and competitive so I am very stressed. December was really bad - I worked 9-5 as usual, plus evenings sometimes till midnight and 3 week-ends both Saturdays and Sundays....then there was Christmas. At the end of my tether basically - feeling unable to copy. That's how I came upon this site - googling single parents, work and stress.
The kids see their Dad at least once a week - he comes over but since we seperated he's only had them overnight maybe 4 times (once a year basically) but the situation with that is yet another other story - with finance, divorce, childcare and emotional issues there. I can see at least 3 threads emerging already
I read a discussion here on the joys of being a single parent - very inspiring and it made me realise that I do tend to focus on the negative - I am very proud of my kids and I am NOT totally useless as I have managed to do some things right.
I've also picked up a suggestion here for stress - I've bought Kalms and will see how I get on with those.
Also looking forward to the events - another thing I really need to do (to quote my 16 year daughter) is to "get a life."
Oh and have forever suffered from insomnia which doesn't help either 
Hi me_pip. Welcome along. I have just the one boy aged 9. Sometimes it feels like I'm living with a partner, or even my father hehe. Have you seen the GP for the insomnia? I'm with you on that, as I don't sleep very well, and now take tablets on prescription. Don't use them every night, but they do help.
What are you up to today?
Ah yes insomnia... It was so handy when the rugby World Cup was on 
now I tend to watch News 24!
That's nice your daughter says 'get a life'. Does she babysit? My older two are pretty good, to be fair - well my daughter more reliable than my son (she's 17, 18 next month). My now 16 year old has autism/aspurger's syndrome, so still needs keeping an eye on, and the almost 13 year old is a bit scatty!
I'm sure if you kept a note of things you did well it would be miles longer than the things that perhaps didn't quite work out.
Hey Ms-pip, welcome from me, too!
I have 3 boys and a girl (23, 17 in 2 weeks, 15 and 13), and yes, it's tough and tiring, but really really worth it! (I hope 
)
This site is brillian and everyone is realy helpful! xxx
Helllo again
Wow you have been working too hard!!!!! Time to cut yourself some slack...is this possible? What can you do tor elax, what do you enjoy?
welcome from me to ms pip - i have two girls aged 10 and 13 and been separated 8 weeks ish
Hi Hazeleyes. Yes I know what you mean, my a friend of mine actually refers to my son as my "little husband" I'm actually quite scared about going to the GP, I use herbal nytol and sominex but still feel half asleep in the mornings so now am trying some self-hypnosis tapes I bought over the internet (if only I had the time to use them!) just afraid I might get too reliant on anything stronger. I have enough going on as it is!
Thank you sparklinglime, and yes she will babysit for a small fee :) in fact generally she's quite helpful (I'm choosing to ignore the normal teenage mood swings and arguments here) the problem is that I'm so bogged down with work and most of my close friends are a bit of a distance away, I'm finding it a bit difficult to make local ones too. I'm mostly too tired to do anything to be honest. Then of course money is the other factor. I'm hoping I can get some ideas here anyway, at least start making some plans if nothing else
Hi Louise, I agree! But I hope things start slowing down this year. I'm not sure that work will ever be stress free but hopefully not as stressful.
I try to read a bit before bed and maybe watch a movie to unwind (squashing this into an evening means I get even less sleep)
I love to travel - we don't go on holiday every year but when we do it's a family thing - would love a spa break on my own, there are quite a few good deals around but can't rely on the kids father to look after them - he's subject to changing his mind at the last minute.
Also don't have many local friends, we go out at work sometimes but it's not the same. I was toying with the idea of joining a salsa class but just don't have the time.
Oh I do go to gym, 2-3 times a week. This must help as I didn't have time to go in Dec which I think contributed to my stress levels building up to this point - even just looking at my work phone sends shivers down my spine - have literally hidden it away till tomorrow
Someone suggested listening to Classic FM during the night. I've never tried it, mind...
Hi ms_pip, I've been separated for two and a half years and I've got a seven-year-old son too - and when we wake up he'll be eight! Very exciting, despite being just after Christmas and everything...
I was wondering how far away you are from you friends - did you have to/ decide to move away after splitting with your ex? Are you able to organise any days/ weekends for them to visit - as you've got so much on your plate I can see that you won't have much time to travel yourself.
Even just a day spent with one of my homegirls can set me up for a couple of weeks.
But if you're struggling for a social life apart from the gym, I can recommend starting by going to the cinema with your youngest - we went to see Puss In Boots today and it was hilarious - I haven't laughed so much since Kung Fu Panda 1.
OK, off to wrap up birthday presents and rustle up stuff for a special breakfast...
Take care,
Lucy
Hi Lucy, first a big happy birthday to your little boy, I'm very excited for you, I love that sort of age - you still get the hugs and everything - just not in public.
Thanks for your suggestion will definitely check it out, we all loved the shrek movies. I have to admit I sort of did invite people over for the 1st of Jan but ducked out - too tired 
, but totally get what you're saying about the 'homegirls'. I will definitely make the effort to arrange something this week, thanks for reminding me! We moved as a family from London and I now work here, it's quieter and not to bad to commute but just never managed to make any real friends here though I've got some at work. Sometimes I'm really bad with keeping in touch tbh.
Also thanks to sparklinglime for music suggestion, as far as there aren't too many love songs should be OK (or maybe jazz fm instead?)
I feel more positive already with all the support and feedback - I've also taken 2 kalms so I'm not dreading tomorrow (work) as much.
Anyway, wishing you both a wonderful day tomorrow!
Lucy Parsons, Happy Birthday to your lovely boy!!!!
Ms_pip, hello and I hope you got a better night. yes the key to it does sound finding ways to be less tired and I am still thinking that means thinking of ways to cut down your work.....As for the salsa, it would be worth going to the gym only twice and adding salsa into the mix, or zumba....something FUN. When we are busy (and I have always worked while being a single parent too) we can get into a pattern of work at work, work at home......and every time we sit down, we fall asleep (that's my perception of it anyway) And sometimes staying luducrously busy is a way of avoiding our feelings, that was DEFNITELY something I did.
There is some good company on here for you, too,as you have already found. Stay with us 
Hi Pip
Good to see you here.
It's a great place for support - even if it's virtual.
I've been on my own for over seven years now, and my lot are getting on a bit!! My oldest is 20, my only daughter is 17, and as its after midnight, I have a 16 and 12 year old too. My 16 year old has special needs...
We have pets