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C's father (pig) has been seen a few days ago. So, what do I do? Nothing, and play ignorant, as he hasn't been in contact, or do I text him saying if he wants to see C, then I will arrange supervised visits? Not sure when he arrived in England, but he did sort of threaten that he'd be returning. I don't want to play a victim in this, and let him think he's got control, but on the other hand, he's had no contact, C's none the wiser, so maybe I should let him make the first move?
This is just the last straw for me, after the weeks I've had. Feel I'm sinking further and further. Not felt so out of control for years.
Thankyou littleredhen. Sorry, sometimes when I post, I forget that others haven't been here as long as me, so don't know my 'story'. At the minute, I'm loathing everything about what is going on, new job, new people, well not so new, but down right ignorant. Hearing my son's father is back in the country was the last straw for me today, but I shall stay strong (she says, hehe). Hope you're okay.
Hey Hazeleyes,
you'll be ok, you're a tough cookie!
I'd just ignore him for now, but keep a close eye on C, just in case he plans to 'surprise' him!
I've not caught up on the job front - what's happened. I was so sure everything would be sorted because they know you there and know what you're like way before.
Big hugs to you and hang in there!
it is so hard when things don't go right - you must be due for some good stuff soon ;-)
Hi dear Hazeleyes
Tempting though it must be to seize the bull by the horns, i would do precisely nothing. As you say, C is none the wiser. This does not make you a victim, it means that you are getting on with your life and not leaping into action the moment he appears in the area. If he contacts you, be calm, and say Ok we will arrange supervised contact. Getting upset or angry DOES hand the control to him, however. As I said in another post on another topic recently, there are a lot of things in life that are about "holding your nerve" and this is one such thing.
Yes, a lot of things have changed for you lately and although there have been issues with work, the school holiday thing is absolutely invaluable so do hang on to that. This situation is not for ever, it is while C is so young 
I completely understand where PG is coming from when she posts about awful days. If it wasn't for C, I would phone in sick tomorrow. I am constantly thinking of the holiday thing Louise, and Hopeful, right now, I don't feel like a tough cookie, in fact nothing but. Thankyou littleredhen, thought this new job was the start of something good, but........
Do nothing. Do absolutely nothing.
less than four hours to deal with... xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Thinking of you hazeleyes, hope you have had a better day today
Hi all. Yesterday was much better as all staff were in a great mood! One of the nice TA's asked me what I was doing at lunchtime. She's been there a year, and still doesn't feel as if she 'fits' in really, though she said it is better than when she first started. Anyhow, told her I needed to get the xmas tree back home during the lunch break, as I'd have too much other stuff to haul back (C's bits and pieces). She very kindly offered to take me in her car, (what an angel). Went in my classroom and there sitting on desk was a present from the teacher! A bottle of wine, and a card thanking me for my support. Did check it twice to make sure it was mine and not other TA's. Went over to thank him, and he gave me a kiss. Talk about me being gobsmacked.
During lunchtime TA and I had a chat, she really is lovely, and she at least knows where I'm coming from. Back at school, all the staff wore Santa's hats, and we sang to the children. C cringed, but he enjoyed me being in it really! It was a fantastic atmosphere. Then another surprise, I was asked to go for a drink at local pub. Wasn't too keen to be honest, but thought if I went, I would see another side to some of the staff. Friday friend told me to definately go for it, and came back to mine with the boys. Only stayed for one drink, and the same TA dropped me home. Have to say it was nice, and my teacher was also there. All gave me a kiss, wished me a lovely Christmas, and teacher thanked me again for support.
To top my day off, C told me he'd received a certificate for hard work, and walked on the Red Carpet during assembly. That totally made my day. Had good evening with Friday friend playing Christmas carols for the boys.
Thursday I was so so down, woke up yesterday morning with cold and sore throat, same today too, so maybe coming down with that was what dragged me down a bit.
Nothing from 'him', and I'm not going to give him a second thought. He won't spoil mine and C's holiday, and definately not our Christmas either.
Thankyou everyone. xx
I am so very, very glad you had such a lovely day.
xxx
Oh that sounds such a nice day, Hazeleyes, excellent news 
Hi hazeleyes, glad that you got a pressie from teacher. I guess all the staff at school are feeling exhausted this time of year, but it sounds as though they do appreciate you.
Please take heed to what Louise has said over the next few weeks. You could remember my favourite mantras "I am in control of MY life" and "I love and approve of myself".
If your ex turns up, then you will deal with it. Don't give him any more than he asks for. Don't invite him in, don't cook for him, don't offer an afternoon with C. Just let him request what he wants, tell him you will think about it and get back to him later.
Good luck
Thankyou Anna. So far so good. Haven't seen or heard from him. Had to laugh at 'Don't cook for him', as if I would!!
hi hazeleyes - sending you a hug - i haven't caught up with your story yet and i am sure others will be along with sound advice but just want you to know i am thinking of you. hope you can be strong - sending you some positive vibes