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has anyone been in a refuge, wud like to no
hi hun i would like to come back to my home tho, its council property,just dont want take my 2 boys out of school, my 14 year old as exams coming up,my other son is 10,i would like to go in refuge for a break from ex constant harassing,but want to come back to my home,i could do thatxx
Hi kiera, I have just left a message on your other thread.
I just want you to know that whatever the future holds regarding your current home, your boys exams, your baby girl etc you will get the support to be free of your ex.
So take that leap kiera, you can do it, we are all behind you. 
hi i took the leap and went to refuge, i moved from anyone and everyone i know iv got two boys 6 and 4 and was pregnant at the time, it was the best thing i could have done i have a lovely house now and were all settled although i miss my friends and family and need to make some friends you should definatly do it refuge is a fantastic organisationx
Hi newarea help, thanks for your input. I agree Refuge is a fantastic organisation.
It takes a lot of guts to go and ask for help and a serious situation to have to leave the area where friends and family are, I admire your courage. You obviously want the best for your family.
How are you these days?
hi i dont no what do, but everytime ex harasses me alday more i want to move,but im 2 scared to even mention it to my kids, i dont no why, they dont av a clue bout refuges,never mention it, ex ringing and txting alday ive ad to turn mobile off and unplug my house fone,
Hi Keira, Im not sure if you can keep your current home if you go in to a refuge to be honest, unless you were willing to pay for both. Have you thought about the Sanctuary Scheme if you wanted to stay in your own home? It was something I looked in to as a back up incase my ex discovers my current address. Im not 100% sure if it still runs because of cuts etc but you could enquire via your local council or Womens Aid. It basically means they adapt your home to be 100% secure so you will feel safe inside it and then they give you additional support out and about within the community. You would need to change your tel no.s though so he can stop harrassing you by phone.
yes i can still keep my home ive checked temporary i can av houseing benifit for refuge and my home,im classed as high risk im marraced, ive got new locks,light fitted in garden, and alarms on every window,gona change my mobile number,
That all sounds good.
You need to do this though, and I know it does take courage. You need to, and so do your children, be free of this.
Hi Kiera,
Thank you for messaging me. Your situation sounds awful, similar to mine but you have small children so you really have to get out. My son is 15 and this had been going on for 16 years and I am ashamed to say I should of gone years ago. My son hates his dad and only now can I see the damage it has done to him.
Before I went I looked at all options. I was offered a refuge but didn't feel that I wanted to do that. I was lucky because I managed to get a deposit from a friend and privately rented a flat that took people on benefits. I looked into all the benefits that I could get which you need to do. Get as much help as possible. He found out where I lived quite quickly and I had a year of problems. He turned up at my flat, shouting and smashing at the door. Police were called on many occasions. Finally I was given a council flat which I love and he doesn't know where I am now. I think you should go into a refuge because they will find you somewhere to live eventually. You really need to start somewhere. At least you are making the move at these early stages. Dont wait years like I did. You will be fine. And you need to think of your children. They will be a lot happier away from him.