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Thank you Kiera, it is very hard and it makes me feel ill at times, so scared all the time with it. So sorry to hear about your son again, why can't they help him better instead of just fixing it a bit at the time ? You are in for a tough day today Kiera, hope your kids get well and that dla will grant it for you as it is obviously not going well with him at all xx
So sorry about your neigbour Sparkling, as you had such a good connection with her. hugs for you.
Glad you had a good time with your friend Pancakequeen and that you did get a catch up with sleep 
Hi keira good to hear from you, it sounds like you have quite alot on your plate at the moment, i hope all goes well at the hospital and that there able to help your son, hope your daughter gets well soon too 
how are things going with your new chap?
I can imagine what a shock that was coming out the blue like that ((Big hug)) hope you enjoyed your weekend though.
Sounds like your going to be busy with your move Skyflower, when do you move?
Hi PQ good that you had a nice weekend, i love a roast and would cook one just for myself, though i would be eating it for a few days. Does A have an inset day today, i hope shes not poorly?
I have had rather a boring weekend, were i did absolutely nothing well i did read a book but mostly recharged my batteries and spent time with my children, Great. A choose Pizza Louise.
Hi Sally I will get the key unofficially next week and will have to arrange a date, I am packing and also buying stuff and no place to put it. Here I have to tidy up continuously for viewings and then I can't find things back 
, wish it was done already ...
Boring weekend, I want one of those, just for once
Sparling, so sorry to hear about your neighbour. I know from the many years of chatting to you, that you were fond of her. Big hugs to you all. How are the children? Just like my neighbour a few weeks ago, it was such a shock eh. xxx
hi to everyone else here. Lots going on, but took day off today as C not feeling great, but have to say we've had a lovely chilling day, just what doctor ordered.
Morning Everyone, rather chilly here this morning it is all frosty.
I feel for you Skyflower, i moved a few years ago it was chaos for ages and i still have boxes in the shed and cupboard that i haven't touched 
do you have any plans for today?
Hi hazeleyes i hope c is feeling better today, also hope you manage to finally put an end to the bullying.
How is everyone else? hope your all doing o.k?
It's work for me, i'm also hoping i may have time later to get a trim.
Skyflower, I'm like Sally, and still have boxes that I've not unpacked - mainly as this house is a lot smaller than where I did live, and things I just can't part with.
Morning,
A was ill sally but she's much better today so gone back to school.
I've still got stuff in the loft from when we moved in 18 years ago 
. Everytime I go up there I try to bring a box/bag down and go through it. Its slowly emptying out!
thank you for all ur replies, well consultan twants my son to av mri scan, and another eeg head scan again, cos bfore he starts fitting, he moves his head cetain way, so she wants to look at front part of his brain, put his does up to 1300mg, and if he as fit in 2 weeks put dose up to 1500, and if he still as fits change his medication to lepra its called, see how it goes, but at last summat bein done, new consultant is very nice, alot apointment,s this thru son as to av physio, then 28th mri scan on his shoulder, the avin his brace off, but side effiect of higher does is sleepiness, and if he gets to sleepyi av to let consultant no, but my son takes it all in his stride, he is 16 11th feb, i am 41 1st feb,lol, goin well with new fella, we av clicked, hes 26 lol, he as gud job so works hard, hes cumin for tea tonyt, see my eldest dawter on 1st for my birthday nyt out, hope everyone is ok x
Hi kiera, glad you are getting some progress. It sounds like this consultant has a plan, which must make you and your son feel better. Sounds good on the fella front too.
Hi everyone (waves madly!) I'm here!! Ok so it is late at night, the site has been down and I promised to watch Sun Sea and Sex in Thailand with my daughter, so haven't had the chance to catch up with everyone's news, but it is good to back here (although I will be doing behind the scenes stuff too ) and I look forward to catching up with you all
I just want to quickly say to kiera, I am so pleased to read that your son's new consultant is very nice and it seems as though they are really trying to figure out the best course of action.
Hi pq & sparklinglime, can't believe you still haven't unpacked boxes from a hundred years ago!!
hazeleyes, really nice to see you! Its been such a long time, sorry to read that C is experiencing some more bullying, I will catch up with what has been going on. I hope that you are looking after yourself.
Skyflower - new house??!! What fun!!
I am off to London tomorrow for a meeting, but will be back online tomorrow eve, to read some more.
Big hugs to you all xx
Hey Kiera, so glad you got this consultant and they might finally get some good results with your son ! Fantastic news.
glad I don't have to feel guilty if it takes mr some time to empty the boxes, thanks for telling me that. I know what you are saying Sparkling not being able to part with things and downsizing. How are you now as it was such a shock with your neighbour ?
am really not looking forward to the removal bit but will be glad when it's all done as it will be so much better for all of us to move and the neighbours are so very nice.
Anna hope your meeting will go fine in London and hazel eyes so good you can do something against that bullying that has been going on and on, can't believe a head teacher like that.
Can't sleep, too much going on with all investigations I know it's no use to worry as what happens will happen I just can't seem to stop it.
Morning All
Welcome back Anna, it is good to have you back on here with us, enjoy your trip to London, remember next time your taking me with you 
It is difficult Skyflower when you can't sleep for worrying, are you able to get a nap during the day?
Glad A is better PQ, has everything calmed down with H?
Keira thankfully everything seems to finally be moving along with getting your son's condition stablised, sounds like things are going well with your new chap.
How are you today sparkling is it work for you?
Busy day ahead for me, i have an ever growing pile of paperwork to get through!
Morning,
H is better, thanks sally, although yesterday she got herself in a bit of a state, but we managed to avoid the full blown tantrum thankfully. Just trying to give loads of random compliments to boost her confidence.
Finally got my appointment today to see the consultant about my back. I've been struggling with it for so long it will be good to get someone to look at it and hopefully arrange some physio.
Its wet and grim here today, Monday frost, Tuesday Fog, today drizzle....what will tomorrow bring....hopefully not snow
hi sally im sorry im new to this . i saw your reply but didnt know how to reply to u there was no reply box at bottom of your message. thankyou for your support . yes i have family amd friends supporting me and cpn nurse and a lady that deals in domestic abuse. its blood hard some days just got to ride the storm of emotions. its nice in a funny kind of way to see people who are in same postion. u dont feel so alone. it helps to talk about it and get ANGER out .
Hi PQ how did your appointment for your back go today ? Hi Woodview, if there is no box it usually means you are not logged in, it is good to not feel alone in these situations, we are all here supporting each other, welcome !
Hi Sally hope you are getting through your paperwork...had to go to work today but could leave a bit early and haven't done any shopping, it will have to be done tomorrow. I used to do shopping online but lately there is always something missing and you still have to get out. Hope everyone has a good day
Hi all
Had an interesting meeting today in London, hopefully I will be able to share more once more actions are in motion.
Skyflower, glad you got to leave work early today, it sounds as though you needed a bit of a break.
Hi pq, i liked that you managed to keep H's tantrum at bay with lots of positive comments, it really does work, not only does it help our children, it helps us keep control too! Did you find your visit to the consultant constructive?
Hi woodview, we have not met before, but I look forward to hearing your news. It is good to share experiences of DVA and become aware that this is going on for other people too. We are here to support you all the way through and feel free to vent some of that anger, the sooner you are through the angry stage, the sooner you can move on with the rest of your life! Have you seen our article Process of overcoming grief/trauma?
I hope everyone else is well today and remembering to wrap up warm so that the cold, muggy weather doesn't bring us down. Have a good evening.
Thanks anna it does seem to be working.
I didn't see a dr today, she was a specialist physio, very thorough, doesn't think it's a disc problem, which is a relief! She's sending me for an mri scan to rule it out. She's also told me i need to do pilates and has recommended a dvd to buy. Got to go back in 8 weeks to see how I'm getting on. I've ordered the dvd so we'll see how i get on. I've not done pilates before.
Hello woodview and welcome to the chat page. Finding others who have gone through similar things is very helpful i think, it certainly helped me.
Just made a banana and walnut loaf with H and it smells delicious :-)
Sounds really yum PQ and glad she is sorting it out. Back pain is terrible to have
Glad your meeting went well Anna, yes I needed that break and I am making camomille tea, hopefully I will sleep with that. Am still waiting for quotes for the blinds and curtains and the carpet man was very kind and quoted actually less than he had done initially, have a nice evening all
Hi everyone.
PQ the ex has suffered with his back for years. At times he has been barely able to walk because of it. But, the most sceptical (and scared of needles) man I know has had a course of acupuncture and the difference in him is amazing. He can actually pick J up and walk without being in pain.
Still can't believe he did something so radical!
Morning,
Glad everything went positively at the hospital PQ, let us know how you get on with the pilates, the banana loaf sounds great.
Hi woodview, how are you doing today?
Hi Looby, it is great that he faced up to his fears and that he has had such great results. How are you and J ?
Hope you slept well last night Skyflower, sounds like things are coming together with your move.
Look forward to hearing more about your trip to London Anna.
Work this morning, have sometime off this afternoon so am going to do abit of grocery shopping, if i have the time i may go for a coffee too.
The banana loaf was a great hit, but as neither of the girls like cake I took it to work for my colleagues .
Hi Looby, I have had accupuncture before, although not for my back, I have heard it can do great things.
Enjoy your coffee sally.
Yum lucky colleagues pq, good to read that the physio doesn't think it is a disc problem. I feel kind of excited about your pilates DVD!!
Skyflower, hope the camomiles tea worked!
Looby! Long time no see! I hope all is well with you, what is your news?
Sally I think you should take a leaf out of pq's book and bake something and bring it in for your colleagues 
Hi Anna I actually slept really well, thank you, had 2 bags left soaking for 20 minutes and it worked! Did your colleagues like your cake PQ ? Finally got the last quotes it's so expensive to move house, this is hopefully the last for a very long time
is it nice doing Pilates ?
have a nice evening all
Well the dvd was waiting for me when I got home. I was going to give it a go last night but I fell asleep on the sofa so headed off to bed instead.
The banana loaf went down really well, might do a bit more baking next week
So glad its nearly the weekend
Skyflower, glad you had a good sleep it is so refreshing isn't it! I have heard moving house can cost an arm and a leg, so glad that you can see that it is the last time for a while that you will be doing it.
pq, fell asleep on the sofa! I found when I was doing a keep fit video (oops DVD!) that when it got difficult I used to sit on the sofa until it passed! Not the way forward. One helpful way of ensuring that you DO do the exercise is write down the days and times on your calendar/diary. Apparently you are more likely to stick to it, otherwise, life can just take over. Good luck with it!
Well Friday is here, hooray! Louise I hope that you have had a good week and that your weekend is relaxing OR exciting......whatever you wish it to be.
Have a good one everyone
We're sorting out clothes for my neighbour's funeral tomorrow.
It has been so sad seeing her home being cleared. My sons have been helping where they can, which is good.
I hope everyone had a good weekend.
Morning all.
The weekend is here at last! I'm going out tonight which I'm really looking forward to. We're going to a restaurant called Bill's, it's not long opened, so hopefully will be good. I've been to the one in Cambridge for lunch and had a good meal so fingers crossed.
What's everyone else up to?
Sparkling, I do hope the funeral goes ok. Thinking of you all xx
Hello there and I am glad to be back with you again, how are you doing?
Just been catching up on all your news.
Sparkling I am so sorry about your neighbour, and glad that you have good memories of her. Will be thinking of you today and hope it is a day you can celebrate her life.
PQ I agree that a roast is never wasted, I usually do a small piece of meat in the slow cooker, that way it does not dry up. How is your back? I also know someone who was helped with acupuncture. Hope you enjoy your meal today.
Skyflower how is the packing going? Only a few days till you get the key! Glad the camomile tea helped with the sleeping.
Hazeleyes, sorry to hear that C has been poorly, hope better now.
Kiera, that sounds very positive about your son, in that they finally have an action plan...interesting that they see him moving his head in a certain way before a fit, that might hold the clue.
Looby, how are you doing?
Anna nice to see you back on the boards! I started watching the Thailand programme but there was ladyboy overkill!
Sally how are you and the family? I see that your baking services are being requested in the SPAN office.
I have had a good week. Here are my highights (you have to imagine a clock going "BONG" like News At Ten)
Been to see 12 years a Slave. Good, but not as good as the reviews
Youngest bought a massive nerf gun, much to my horror
Youngest realised he needs four expensive batteries for nerf gun, much to my amusement
Eldest coming next weekend. Things getting very serious with The Girl
Finally decluttered and shredded unwanted contemts of giant filing cabinet drawer
Dyed hair, went out for two posh coffees, consoled friend with ill husband, made appointment with dentist (avoiding Eva Braun one)
Youngest sent on "undercover" mission to the local lap-dancing club (by the nightclub where he works),to look at drinks prices and customer numbers. He went in and announced "I am here for a conference and am from the Everton area" (in a Yorkshire accent haha) He couldn't be a spy!
Hope everyone will have a good day
Sparkling thinking of you today xx
Louise good to see you back and glad you had an eventful week What colour is your hair now ? the nerf gun why is it they love it so much and you end up with finding bullets in the most strange places ? I am doing the tea now and I do sleep a bit better but every time I get news about court I am shattered again and if things go different than said I can't stop worrying if they are changing their minds what they said. Had a phone call with layman yesterday and she said it takes only one with different opinion and your children will be long term in fostercare she said I have to appeal the fact find but I am so running out of money. Phoned visiting centre as they were supposed to have started and they said they wanted the old reports of psychologist before starting to work with the children to save me money and have contacted all solicitors to have the old report. This has to be approved in court which again will be 1000 or so pounds. The report was very biased and many professionals did not agree with that report. It seems to go continuously in circles. I don't want them working with that report but just work with helping the children. In the mean time judge can get fed up with all postpone ments and put kids into care.
had eye test done as I was a bit struggling with reading, they kindly told me it's 2,25 difference will get my new glasses hopefully next week.
Hello Skyflower, you really are doing everything you can, and all I can do is to encourage you to keep going although you must be exhausted. It is dreadful not only that these people can have so much power over our children but also that they sometimes work on wrong information!
That will be good, to get the right glasses. Mine are about 1.75 but I am very reliant on them for reading especially if the light is not bright. My hair is the same (brunette), I was just covering up all the grey bits, haha.
I am on creche duty at the church tomorrow, eek.
Thank you for the thoughts.
My daughter didn't come as she was poorly, so just me and the youngest.
One heck of a thunder storm when we came back, which I think has broken my phone which is now playing up. I did unplug the router though - for a change...
I shall have an early night tonight as I feel rather tired.
Lovely to 'see' you here Louise, and your post has made me smile.
Take care everyone.
It made me cry Louise, as you said I am doing all I can because I feel like I never do enough and I am trying so hard, I feel so very desperate and inadequate and I have done nothing wrong and can lose my children just like that..
Phoned my father tonight and he said : it has been so long since you visited why aren't you coming over here and he has had a brain hemorrhage and I can't explain to him I will never see him again....
and you made me smile about your hair. Thank you Louise I will fight a little longer
Just popping in to say I am still here! One more Herceptin injection (on Thursday) and then that's it for medication, hurrah! :-) It's taking its toll now though, I am exhausted, but can't sleep properly.
Work with 12,5 hour shifts doesn't help that - had two night shifts, hence I am not in bed yet.
Hope you are all ok. Will try to catch up properly when I am more awake! x
Well done, sparkling, for going yesterday and I hop you got a good rest.
Skyflower, so hard about your dad. Big HUGS. Yes, do keep going, think of us like an energy drink where you can log on and our encouragement gives you a boost 
Hopeful, how fantastic to reach this final treatment, just the Tamoxifen now but at least you can take that without an appointment, hope you wound down for some sleep after you shifts. Have you got a couple of days off now?
What's on the agenda today for everyone? Creche for me so better not wear anything that's not up to a bit of dribble and soggy biscuit (*puts Versace evening gown back in the wardrobe*)
Morning.
Had a lovely evening last night. Bill's was really nice.
Mum's taxi is on my agenda today! A is taking part in British arts for her singing and drama so I'll be running her around for that. Might try the plates dvd later too.
Hi hopeful. Glad to hear your treatment is coming to an end. Those 12.5 hour shifts are a killer!
Hope you're okay sparkling?
Louise, what makes you think I will take the Tamoxifen? I won't! It made me be suicidal and miserable. I am quite happy now, so I am not taking it. I'd rather have another mastectomy and a whole new lot of chemotherapy and losing my hair and everything than feel like that. :-)
Reconstruction will be the next step, yay!
Going to help daughter write her statement for A-level application today. Big sigh. But at least she's still relatively keen on school
Wishing everyone a lovely Sunday!
Ah yes Hopeful I remember how tough it was when you first started taking it, did not know if you had carried on. So is your daughter thinking of college or the sixth form at school?
PQ glad you enjoyed the meal. Good luck for A!
Sparkling, how are you doing, any news on your phone?
Hope everyone is having a good evening, I wish you a productive few days and see you next weekend
Morning All
I hope your all doing well? it was quiet in here yesterday.....
Did you try the pilates dvd PQ?
Good to see you Hopeful
Any plans for today sparkling, skyflower, keira
I've had cleaning day. Saw my aunty this morning.
I didn't go to the gym.
I'm hoping as I'm cleaning I'm slowly pulling myself together...
I hope everyone is ok.
Hi all
Big hugs sparkling, them gym might maybe just the ticket though, i have heard others say it can be therapeutic (sorry not sure if i have spelt that right).
A few meetings for me today, oh joy, the first one is at 9am and they provide coffee and crossiants, need to book dentist appointments as we are all way past due on our check ups.
Enjoy your day everyone
Its very quiet on here, everybody must be busy, cleaning day sparkling, its not fun but you feel so much better when everything is clean again. How are you feeling ? You must still feel kind of shell shocked as it all happened so suddenly.
How did the meetings go Sally ? Dentist is not my priority either, teting my new glasses today, will probably make a lot of difference, Hope everyone is alright
Hi all,
Have been having a rough couple of days but seem to be coming out of it now. Had another episode with the girls. H completely lost it again and I had a bit of a melt down! H is in trouble at school so need to get to the bottom of that too. Asked their dad to speak to H to see if he could find out what was going on, apparently he just told her to not take out her problems on me and left it at that....not much help!!!
Work has been a bit quieter and I have been asked if I'd be interested in taking on a new project which sounds very exciting, it would mean giving up some of the work I do now which would be a shame, but its a great opportunity.
Like the new avatar skyflower.
Hope evryone else is ok.
Hi Pancakequeen, thanks about my Avatar :) How is it with your sleeping now ? And your Pilates, is it fun to do? Teenagers are soooo difficult at times, and I know how hard it is to keep your cool when they are shouting and all sorts,
How great to start a new project, it sounds like a good opportunity for you !
hi everyone hope u are all ok, im ok, my eldest son ad mri scan on his shoulder, get results soon, he also as mri brain scan in feb, he asnt ad fit since 13th jan so see how he goes on higher medication, my birthday sat, my eldest dawter cumin sat not seen er since boxin day, we are avin big nyt out, cant wait, il b 42 lol. stil feel 21 tho , very cold today, wonder if snow x
O Kiera, so exciting, your birthday and your daughter coming over ? And your son a bit better on the higher dose, hopefully it will stay this way and they find out soon with the scans what to do, all good news for you, how is your new partner, you still like him?
Hope you are in for some fun it is long overdue xx
Hi everyone, it is quiet in here isn't it, I thought I would stay out of the way so you could chat amongst yourselves
pq, sorry to hear that there was another blowout, also that their dad wasn't much use in supporting H. Do you know the root of the problem or is she just being a teen? Its so easy to get embroiled in their emotions, especially when we don't have a partner to offload to (or hide behind!). I look forward to hearing more about this new work project.
Hi kiera, it sounds as though your son's higher dose of medication is helping, I hope the results of the scan will give some good indication of further help the docs can give you both. Great to hear that your daughter is coming down to celebrate your birthday with you, can't believe another year has passed. Where are you going for your night out?
Skyflower, sparklinglime, hopeful, I hope you have all had a good day.
My solicitor sent me the section 37 report yesterday evening, protected by a password, so when I phoned for the password, all were gone.
Looking at the bright side, glad it was done on Thursday
my last post meant to say a roast for 3 seems like overkill!!
Hi Kiera, hope the consultant can offer some help for your son, it must be awful for him.