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Hi,
I'm new on this! I just wanted some advise please as my daughter (almost 2) has never seen her father before and I feel really guilty because after all it's my fault that he's her father. I recently got into contact with him (for the 2nd time) but have lost contact again. I do not understand how someone can have no desire to see their own blood. What should I do about this situation? Should I turn up at his home? Or just leave him be and continue? I really don't know what is the best thing to do for my daughter! When I did speak to him about contact he seemed more interested in me. I'm also not sure if I should approach his mother who I know quite well to inform her she's a grandmother as she has a right to know too, but he insists I don't. Therefore I feel like my daughter's missing out on her dad and grandma :( I can be quite persuasive and very co operative and even though there is a good hour or so between us in distance I'm sure we could make an arrangement that is suitable for everyone if only he was willing (just half as much as he was in concieving her lol). Please help. Thank you!
Hello allyshaw
When you say you have lost touch with her dad again, does he have your contact details? If yes then he really has got every chance of making a relationship with her and there's not a lot more you can do. Sadly, we cannot make the other parent want to have time with our child. I agree with hazeleyes that you could consider writing to the Grandma and this may work out great....or it may not, Be prepared for the fact that she may not accept the child is his...although I am wondering if the reason he did not want you to approach his mum is he fears she would "make him" take up his reponsibilities. And do make sure he is paying some child support money, even if he does not want to see her.
Hi allyshaw. Welcome along. Can I say that it isn't your fault at all that the father doesn't see his daughter. He is the one that has chosen not to do this, so you have nothing to feel guilty about. Of course, you'd love for your little girl to have contact, but you cannot force him. You may find as she gets older, he might then ask to see her. As for the Grandmother. Maybe you could write to her, and see where it goes.
My son is now 10, and the father didn't want to know. I made contact when my boy was nearly 5, as he wanted to 'meet' his dad. I also spoke to the Grandfather, who didn't want to know either.
I know it's hard, but I know my son has all the love he needs from me, and they are the ones that have missed, and will continue to miss so much.
Does your ex pay toward your daughter? Is he on the birth certificate?