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Hi Anna & Sparklinglime,
How are we , i am going through a nightmare at th moment with a partner who drinks and then gets really angry with me for no reason and then blames me for making them drink all the time , telling me i have no friends, hitting me , throwing things at me and shouting all the time , i cant do anything right or quick enough eating cleaning everyhing. I so wish they would stop drinking for the children and me .my partner is such a good mother and wife to US at all other times, i have just returned to work after 6 months off , i love her very much . i dont know anymore.....
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Hi TIME TO CHANGE - I have moved your post to here so that we could support you in your own thread! Am loving your avatar!!
It sounds as though things at home are pretty tough and I take from your username that you know that it is time to make some changes.
It is easy for me to say at this point, but the love that you feel for your wife is probably wrapped up in pity (for her to be in such an unhappy place) and fear (of doing things wrong and her kicking off). It is not a healthy love where you give and receive support, friendship and respect to one another.
Did you take the 6 months off work, because of your family circumstances?
Are you in touch with any agencies at all? Find out if you have a local Barnados here, as they are an excellent service, who could support your children and give you further information on how to deal with your home life.
Excellent avatar 
welcome time to change - I hope we can help and support you - great bunch of people here - I am lrh for short!
Hi Time To Change
My mum was a drinker started when i was a teen. please seek some help before it gets out of hand for the sake of the children and yourself. Im sure she is an amazing mummy - my mum was but her drinking built up and up and before we realised her had reall drink problems and then we lost her.
Im not saying for one minute this will happen to you but act now please dont do what my dad did and ignore it x
hey
thanks for the advice , mens helpline ill give them a call tommorow , i spoke to young minds about my children 2 nights ago and said she has to go to re hap a, she is hot and cold and i wish she would stop drinking ,we have started mediation with sol***** in Mi**, and is fantastic , so fingers crosssed i can break th cycle and change . thanks all so far for supporting a male here , i have been abused since 2002 ...
Good luck Time To Change
Unfortunately, if the abuse goes with the drinking then nothing is going to improve unless she stops drinking, but of course you know that already. Hope the mediation will help. Sometimes, though, people need to be given an ultimatum. Hopefully the mediation will help her see how close she is to losing you all.
Keep us updated, we are happy to support you
I hope the mediation gives you a chance to talk and be heard. How did you get your wife to agree to go to mediation may I ask?
Hi timetochange how are you doing
hope you are ok and things going well - let us know. its going to be a long hard job but with support you will get through it
big hugs x
Hello Time to Change
You are very welcome here and I am sorry to hear what is going on at home. Have you had any support? Have a look at this site here. Also we can give you plenty of support. It's really hard to reach out for help when our partner has been abusive, especially if we still love them but it is about loving ourselves too and also protecting our children. How old are your children?