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hi im wondering if any1 as hads threat of having their kids took into care, cafcass man said and judge im 1 step away from kids going into care, im devastated,because i kept takingf my ex back and contacting him, we have a little girl together, was emotionaly abusive relationship, plus he seriously assaulted me on holiday, he harassed me,followed me, made threats etc. now i avnt had him back so now of course he takin me court, throwing allegations bout, plus cafcass man told me bout he violent past and long criminal record plus he ad anova life i didnt no bout,anova baby and girlfriend i didnt no bout, cant believe it, just thought of havin my kids took off me treeifies me, i have 2 sons 14 and 10 and 19 yr old daughter, want to no as anybody been thru same thing,
Hi kiera. You must be so worried, but Louise is right, you must stay away from your ex, show the courts and whoever else, that above all else, your children come first. Get rid of his number so you cannot text/phone him. If he turns up, ring the police straight away.
Hi keira, Like the others say it is only if you continue to stay in contact with your abusive ex that your children may be taken in to care. I saw this happen too when worked for social services and it is because the government now takes the effects of domestic violence on children very seriously It is classed as emotional abuse.
In my experience whenever social services have made it clear a woman is to remain away from her ex partner or lose her children they have always offered that woman lots of support in order to do it.
All you need to do is continue to stay away from your ex and you have nothing to worry about. Try not to worry and make use of all the support out there.
hi thank u for replys ive not bin offered any support, at mo ss not involved yet, cafcass will b paying my home a visit at some point tho
kiera would you consider contacting social services and asking for some support?
hi what sort of support would i ask for
People think of social services as "just" for children at risk. They also have a provision for "children in need", nothing to do with the Pudsey charity but extra support for families of children that are going through particular stress, such as a worker to help out and also activities for the children. Now, my experience of this type of service is that funding appears to have been cut quite a lot. Your nest bet would be to have a chat with your Sure Start worker as she will know if there is anything in your local area you can access.
hi well im in touch with surestart worker, she come court with me, i have book with whats goin on for my little girl, gona take er to playgroups in septx
That sounds good 
Hi I just found your thread!
How are you tonight?
Did you ring back the number?
It feels scary because it's out of our control and it's our kids :( I don't like it because it's total strangers that don't know you x
I hope your ok and I think if you havnt then in the morning you should call them ? They won't go away and your showing your ' a big person' by calling them back what do you think chick ?
Hope your ok x
hi i avnt rang them, just a call i was dreading, im ok, trying not to think bout it, dont want ex see my little girl, xx
Yeah I know you don't want her to see him it's so bloody hard isn't it, you'll get through it your strong x
I'm sure that who ever called you may be of some help and may be understanding to you as they will know his violent past so I'm sure they can help you Hun ?
I know it don't feel like that , it's sooo no easy x but you have the fact they know what he's like ? I don't have that xx
hello i no what it like to get treat by sswokers as i trying to get mine back as they
went for no reson but i not given up yet and i did not get my support but now i got some
and one is from span as i done course with there nice people ...like grow up our group
and some others as well....
now i running my own support group myself and i do it on line as well like facebook
when u been throught the amount of sxxx from sswokers well that a new one and
also in my own time i doing a book as well also i am a rep in y area aswell
work in the volc work as well in my local community center and it great fun
so yer i am not giveing up my fright to get my kids back
i avnt heard off s workers at all, and my drug test negative, so im not worryin as much, but yes do not giv up fight to get ur kids bkx
Glad to hear you're not so stressed out, kiera. Good news about your drugs test too!
Hi Kiera,
I know this is an old post but I have first hand experience of Children's Services and having a child in foster care, My Child was removed 3 years ago now and I am still fighting to get her home.
My ex was and still is very much a risk. I never failed to protect my Child but CS took the case through family courts and got awarded a full Care Order.
Once the LA legal department become involved then the threat of removal becomes very real.
Hope all is well in your case.
Hi Kiera,
I know this is an old post but I have first hand experience of Children's Services and having a child in foster care, My Child was removed 3 years ago now and I am still fighting to get her home.
My ex was and still is very much a risk. I never failed to protect my Child but CS took the case through family courts and got awarded a full Care Order.
Once the LA legal department become involved then the threat of removal becomes very real.
Hope all is well in your case.
thank u for ur reply, well cafcass said i failed to protect my kids as i kept takin my violent ex bk, i didnt even no bout his violent past, found out on day we went court, anf found out he ad a secret life, got told im 1 step from care procedings if i keep avin contact with this man, which of course im not, i hate him, heard nothin from social or cafcass, my ex made my life misery, and my kids, all lies and cheatin wot i didnt no bout, but then harassed me when i ended it, and made threats, my story is on thread o nere saying my ex seriously assaulted me while i was on holiday, he was very controllin, no way im losein my kids ova scum like tht
Hi kiera, after everything that you have been through since being on the One Space boards, I think you are doing a brilliant job with it all and you are now keeping your children safe from your ex.
hi well ad letter bfore regardin mediation, surly i dont av to go mediation,does say seperatly, but wots point, ex not allowed cum nr me or my house or area, xany advice
Hi kiera, have you come to a decision as to whether you want your little girl to see her father?
I would contact our legal expert on this issue or give the mediation centre a ring and discuss it with someone there.
hi i dont want ex to c er, hes a violent man, hes not allowed to see er, next hearin is november,,thought mediation not recomended in domestic violence issues, or where there is fear and violencex
I do think that sounds odd, kiera. After the court hearing you have already had and warning you to keep the children away from him! What does your solicitor say?
Hello kiera
Although this has not happened to me personally I have worked with many different families over the years and have seen your situation a few times. I will tell you about some of them.
On one occasion, the children were taken into care but this was for one reason only: the mum had been told by social services not to have anything to do with an abusive partner and she continued to have a relationship with him.
On another occasion, a mum had already got her child on the "at risk"register as she was an alcoholic and then she refused to split up with her abusive partner. Her son went to live with his grand parents.
Both of these women had one thing in common: they continued to have a relationship with an abusive partner after social services had told them not to.
I also worked with a young mum who had a violent partner and chose her child above him, she kept her child and she made a new life for herself. That is what can happen for you, too, if you stay away from your ex partner