hi everyone, ive just joined here and have a problem with my ex. we separated in may and i moved back to my hometown, but my teenage daughter is close to him and calls him dad, so still sees him, in fact has just gone for 2 weeks. problem is, hes involving her in our arguments and moaning about me all the time (i do get a lot of late night texts from him which are nasty). shes 15 and this is upsetting her as she feels torn. ive tried explaining to her that its not her fault, etc. and that he shouldnt be doing this, ive also told him he needs to stop all this if he wants to carry on seeing her, but then she would be upset. also told him that no matter whats going on between us, we do need some sort of communication regarding my daughter. all fallen on deaf ears! i know that legally he has no rights but my daughter loves him. what can i do??? also, does anybody have any get togethers in yorkshire im a bit lonely and looking for friends too x
hi yes she has but he just cant seem to help himself. dont really know where to go from here. will try netmums, thanks!
He obviously loves seeing her too, so would be upset if contact was broken. Perhaps she could tell him that unless he stops, she will have to stop visiting.
Hi jules4444, welcome to One Space and thanks for sharing.
What are your arguments about? Are they necessary? Are they about tying up loose ends or are they just a continuation of the niggles in your relationship?
Your poor daughter must feel very stuck in the middle, I hope that you can say to her that lots of young people face this when parents split up, so she doesn't feel alone with it.
If she wants to continue seeing him and you want nothing more to do with him, is she old enough to make contact with him herself? If she has a mobile phone then you are always able to contact her.
If he doesn't like this and continued to moan about you to your girl, she is will soon form her own opinion on how much time she wants to spend with him.
What do you think of this idea?
Hi jules4444. Welcome along. Has your daughter spoken to her step-dad herself, and explained how upsetting it is for her? It's lovely that she still has contact with him, but she shouldn't have to listen to him badmouthing you. Have you tried NetMums for any get togethers?