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Hi,
I have been divorced for nearly 3 years now and I still haven't done my will! So I have booked for someone to come round to the house and go through it with me. To prepare they have asked me to think about who I want the girls to go with if I die and they are still dependents. I assumed this would automatically be their dad as we have joint responsibilty, is that right? Also they have said they need his address but my ex won't tell me where he lives and has given me his friends address to use instead.
I can see this is going to be a big headache.
Hi PQ, Sergiosed is right you can ask the expert what is legally correct.
I was a bit stuck myself 2 years ago but decided to make my will as I wished it (their dad has PR but does not see the children) and I have named my brother and sister in law, after all, anything can happen in the mean time. He will have to bring it to Court I think, if he wants to. My aunt is the executor of my will and all assets will only go to my children. I kept it very standard and a solicitor will legalise it for 100 or 125 pounds if you keep it simple.
If you do like their dad in your will, just use the address he has given you as he could also move, they will find him through his friend. I really hope you will not be so manipulated by him anymore, you don't deserve a headache because he again is trying to make things so difficult for you. Your solicitor can advise you as well what is best. So much good luck with this.
I find the whole thing really irritating. I'm trying to do the right thing and involve him yet all he wants to do is play games. Makes me so mad 
I've got a will writing company doing it for me. They were supposed to come round yesterday but my daughter was ill sO I cancelled.
I think I will just do it how I want it and he can deal with it if it should be necessary. I've asked my friend to be exectutor and I know she will do whats right for the girls.
You are doing the right thing there PQ, it is about what is right for your children, you have always done the right thing for him, and he just toys with it.
Some don't make things easy, do they..?
I would just like to add that if anyone should be so unfortunate to find themselves in the position of knowing they are terminally ill while they still have dependent children, it is possible for additional people to obtain PR by applying through court and this may make it easier if it is someone you want to care for your children who does not already have PR, in order to have your wishes respected.
Did you make another appointment for the will-writers, PQ?
Hi,
Yes I did Louise, they're coming in 2 weeks. I have also asked 'the expert' on here for advice. I'm meeting my friend tonight and I shall discuss my wishes with her so she knows what I want.
Hi pancakequeen, it sure looks like it could be a big headache indeed! Who is coming to help you write the will? Is that a solicitor? I don't really know much about what happens to the children when there is joint responsibility,if you get stuck you can always ask a question of our legal expert.