Hi Karen
What a double whammy! You were probably just about holding it together re the divorce then POW, the job thing happened. It's important to give yourself time to readjust....and to grieve the two losses you have had. If you find it takes you a while, it is worth getting in touch with your GP to get a referral for counselling so that you can re-evaluate your life.
As you say, you are going into unknown territory now. From the age of 3 your daughter will be entitled to 5 "sessions" per week at nursery. Before then, there will be lots of free and cheap things you can go to, such as local toddler groups. Check at churches in your area or contact the National Childbirth Trust (http://www.nct.org.uk/in-your-area) That way your daughter will get lots of interraction with other children and you can make some new friends yourself.
Good wishes as you move forward with your life now, it may be scary but it is certainly an adventure!
Louise :)
Hi all,
Well my divorce came through Friday morning, was happy and relieved that it was finally all over (I got a quick divorce due to unreasonable behaviour on his part, it took 7 mths) anyhow I went to work, my boss then told me that my contract would not be renewed at the end of March due the recession, I expected it but burst into tears and I cried like I have never cried before, It was a mixture of everything, I hadn't cried since leaving my husband, I just plowed on with life, moved away, got a new job, found us a new home, put little one in nursery thought I was doing really well, but NO..... think I had a little breakdown friday morning and the last 7 months caught up on me all in one go. So after talking it through with my family I have decided to take a minimum of 6 months out and concentrate on me and my daughter. It means I will have to go on benefits, but figure after working for the last 18 years I am due a little help back for what I have put in. I am scared tho about the situation I am going to be in, will i be able to provide the support and experiences my daughter gets from nursery (will have to pull her out as wont be able to afford it), I feel like I have failed (even though deep down i know i haven't), it is horrible feeling like this, hopefully now I realise how low i am i will be able do do something about it.
Congratulations on your divorce :D My divorce came through on my 20th wedding anniversary, so I still have reason to celebrate (terrible, I know really...)
I'm so sorry about your job. You've done so well rebuilding your life. As you say, you will be ok. I'm sure that you will enjoy the time with your daughter - I always worked when my children were small, and I have to say it has been lovely having time with them.
Perhaps it could be time to try a new direction? I've been doing an OU course (lonely at home though). I had been doing voluntary work with the supported housing group that helped me when I was homeless, and had been hoping to move in that direction - sadly they no longer use volunteers, and the association seems to have hit a crisis. I'm helping in my son's primary school now.
I have to say that I ended up on benefits after I separated (lost everything to pay off ex's debts). I worked for 22 years, and I hope I will be working before the year is out.
Sorry to moider on about me! Sending you loads of hugs and luck with the future.
Finances can be hard. I'm sure you've already done it, but do work out a budget that is workable.
Scottish Power hiked my DD payments by £30 a month last month (even though I'm well in credit!) so that has made things even tougher here!
I hope you have a brilliant night out!
Hi Karen
Wow, girl - you've been through nearly all the most stressful life event - moving, divorce, new job - in the space of 7 months (I did exact same thing 5 years ago!) but to add redundancy to that is bound to push you over the edge! Don't feel bad about needing some time to cope with it all. No way have you failed. The global economic crisis is really not your fault! ;)
Having some breathing space for you and your daughter will work out fine and I'm sure you WILL be able to make up for anything she miss on leaving nursery: toddler groups are cheap and your library / health visitor / websites like netmums and Primary Times and this one (!) will be able to point you in the direction of lots of other cheap / free things to do with her.
Take care :)
Fi xx