More jokes
:lol: :lol: :lol:
I'm coming to the conclusion I'm a coward. Well, possibly knew that already! 8-)
ha ha...
anyway, me! me! me!
a joke, possibly sexist, I duno I'm a bloke init...
(obviously I didn't invent it, I found it on the interwebs)
A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic liberal ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.
"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man.. Is something bothering you?"
"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature."
The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."
"Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."
The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself."
The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when was the last time you had sex?"
"1955, ma'am."
"Well, there you are. No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out and relax! I mean, no sex since 1955! Come with me."
She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times.
Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his grizzled bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955."
The Sergeant Major said in his serious voice, after glancing at his watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now."
it made me laugh anyway.. : )
I liked them both, but I will be pinching the sergeant major one to tell people.
This is my favourite joke of all time:
A penguin goes into a bar and says to the barman "Has my brother been in? " "Dunno mate" says the barman, "What does he look like?"
HAHAHAHA
A horse walks into a bar and the barman says... why the long face?
:)
Daft person goes into computer shop looking for curtains for her pc.
Shop assistant says you don't need curtains for your pc.
Daft person says, 'Hello..... I've got windows, duh!!'
OK! no swearing in this one : ) just a funny picture.
...and the strange thing is, you never see them together! Has anyone got any more looky-likies?
Ha ha, great similarity!
Eeyore 73 I forgot to say how much I enjoyed your joke!! I have told absolutely everyone it. I think it is simple yet satisfying!!!
Two rather funny video clips : )
Lullaby (The Divorce Song) -- Stephen Lynch
Rodney Carrington Today's The Day My Wife Met My Girlfriend
later.. : )