single mum, 23 yrs old...feeling lonely

aimeelou0908

hi guys.
well were to start....
my name is rachel, im from bolton in manchester, im only 23 yrs old and im a single mum to aimee who is 13 months old.
im on here to make new friends and get chattin to single mums like my self.

i broke up with aimees dad back in november and since then it has been a lonley life...my childless friends dont invite me out any more because i devote all my time to my daughter....i dont wanna date, all i wanna do is natter over coffee and talk bout babies like all mums do....i do have friends who have children but none who are the same age as aimee so u can sort of see why im fed up.

if there are any mums near me or who wud like a good old natter please msg me back
ty xxx

Posted on: May 15, 2009 - 11:37pm

sparklinglime

Hi Rachel

I'm not from Manchester way, I'm afraid, but wanted to say hello to you.

I've been on my own for over five years year now, and my youngest is now 10! Looking back you realise how quickly time does go by!

The evenings can be long and lonely, and for me, that's where the internet comes into it. My older two are old enough to babysit, but as sad as it sounds, there isn't anyone really to go out with! I'd have no idea where to start either :lol: My life revolves around my four children.

Best wishes

Posted on: May 16, 2009 - 12:01pm

Louise

Parenting specialist

Hi Rachel

Good to hear from you and I hope there are some parents in your area to chat to. As sparkling lime says, the Internet is a real life line when you're on your own with kids. You make a really interesting point about how your priorities change when you become a parent and so maybe it is worth looking at ALL the ways you can meet other parents. Have a word with your health visitor about toddler groups in your area, or could think about joining the national Childbirth Trust (they are not all single parents but they are parents with children of a similar age to Aimee) Go to http://www.nctpregnancyandbabycare.com/in-your-area to find them. There is also a great organsation called net mums that organises local events. You can find them at http://www.netmums.com/coffeehouse/

Keep coming on here too, we are here for friendly support!

Louise :D

Posted on: May 17, 2009 - 8:55am

MAYJACK

Hi Rachel

Im not from Bolton way but not too far, im in liverpool
im 27 and my little boy is 17 months ive been a single mum since his first birthday so about 5 months now.
I understand how you feel, none of my close friends have children and they are all in happy relationships so i feel a bit isolated form them sometimes.

Not really ready for a relationship either maybe one day hey!!!
My little boy is my priority, it would be good to chat I think we'd have a lot in common.

Posted on: June 6, 2009 - 9:52pm

wizzy100

Hi Rachel! I am also a single mum in my twenties and know what you mean about feeling out of the loop with your friends sometimes. I had a really full social life before I had my daughter, and had to move away from the city to bring her up nearer my family so I dont see so much of my friends now. When I do, they are great and I have an awesome time, but coming home I do miss even just having mates to pop over and see or who can pop over and see me! I wouldn't say I wanna chat about my girl all the time, I would go nuts if I didn't allow myself some of my own life as well, but having someone to relate to about what it's like for us would sure be a good thing! Your priorities change completely when you become a mum, and it can be really hard seeing others skip by in life relatively free of responsibilites! Wouldn't it be good to have a group of mums our own age to talk to? In my area I have found all the mums are either in their thirties or still in their teens! Where's the middle ground!??! lol! do you have this problem?

Posted on: July 26, 2009 - 7:13pm

zane26

hi rachel

sadly not from ur area but wanted to say hi. i'm a single mum in my 20s and have no mate at all (sad huh) once i had my son he was ill and in hospital for 8 months and he has several conditions now so i have devoted my life to him and his sister(thankfully ok) so lost touch with everyone so know how u feel. Most i can offer is a chat over the net maybe on msn but u can still have ur coffee lol.

Posted on: July 27, 2009 - 9:21pm

mcduff2622

Hi Rachel,
I am not from bolton either but i live sort of close by in Liverpool!
I feel the same, Im 24 and a single mum to my 15 month old daughter, most of my close friends live all over uk having been to university and various things and I dont know anyone here as i just moved here in June after leaving my ex in Leyland
I have been on netmums and other sites but i only ever seem to find happily married (or together) couples with children the same or close ages or single mums who are teenagers or in their 30's/40's whose kids are a lot older..not that you cant be friends with people different ages but it would be nice to meet people with similar interests etc.
Cant really get to Bolton as i dont drive, but if you ever want a chat i am here.
I notice your post was a few months ago so i hope you managed to meet some other mums in your area!!

Mary

Posted on: December 30, 2009 - 6:23pm

hazeleyes

Hi mcduff2622
Welcome to One Space. There are lots of different subjects on here, so have a look around and join in with as many or as little as you like! It certainly can be lonely being a single parent. Have you joined any toddler groups? I actually didn't enjoy these, but some people do.
I did find other single mums of all ages on netmums, so perhaps another browse around?
Look forward to chatting to you
Take care
Alison
x :)

Posted on: December 30, 2009 - 10:02pm

mcduff2622

Hi Alison
I havent been to any toddler groups yet,
kind of find it difficult getting out of the house, suffer from anxiety n some depression. I keep planning to go so maybe soon i will.

Posted on: December 30, 2009 - 10:18pm

hazeleyes

Hi mcduff
Sorry to hear that about the depression and anxiety. Are you on medication or anything?
I think sometimes we can also get into a rut with a child, especially a small child. Somedays, I used to find it too much effort to go out, and then it becomes a vicious cycle doesn't it?
Have you any plans for tomorrow night? Nowt doing here, just me and my 7 year old. He is keen on staying up to see the New Year in, but if I have my way, I shall be tucked up :lol:
Keep posting, loads of lovely people to help and support you.
Take care
Alison
x :)

Posted on: December 30, 2009 - 10:31pm

Louise

Parenting specialist

Hi mcduff2622

Yes it can be a problem when everyone you meet seems happily married (although let me tell you, they aren't all happy ;) )

Click on the link below. I have done a search for you on the main site for services for parents in Liverpool. Of course some of the things on the list are totally irrelevant but there seem to be a couple on the list that cater for isolated parents or parents of pre=school children so have a look and see what you think: http://advicefinder.onespace.org.uk/?filter0=&filter2=163&filter3=parents&op=Search&q=directory-results&form_id=Directory_search_form

Posted on: December 31, 2009 - 8:35am

lightatendoftunnel

My children are a bit older than yours, but is there something called sure start by you?

Or try local colleges, sometimes they have creches where you can go to College for a few hours a week. In my College they had a confidence building course, where there will be lots of people in the same position as you. Is that something you can look into?

Posted on: January 1, 2010 - 9:52am

Claire-Louise

H mcduff2622
How are you doing today? Do you still have snow where you are? We have more forecast here for tomorrow! Wow it is really cold too.
I know sure start has been mentioned and I wondered if you had managed to check that out? Otherwise it is worth going into your local Children's Centre as they are meant to be the new one stop shop for parents and if they don't provide the service you are after there, then they are meant to be able to signpost you on somewhere. I know you mentioned about suffering from depression and anxiety, they sometimes have counsellors on site too who might be able to support you in some way. Most Local Authority Nuersery Schools are now turning into children's centres so see what is in your area. Alternatively you can find out info from your local children's information service in our area. This link might be of some use:
http://childcarefinder.direct.gov.uk/
Good luck
C-L

Posted on: January 9, 2010 - 4:38pm

celestejane

Hi im also lonely iv an 8 yr old boy who is going through a stage, and people are often steering clear of me cos of this. My ex and i parted due to his family interfering, where I live people really keep themselves to themselves. It is difficult on your own but always remember you are a great person and one day your friends will need you, and you will have moved on to better things. love celestejane xx

Posted on: March 31, 2010 - 9:11pm

celestejane

Hi Rachel I hope you got my msg, I forgot to say im from Leicester. Take care celestejane. x

Posted on: March 31, 2010 - 9:14pm

Louise

Parenting specialist

Hello celestejane

Good to hear from you. Rachel's original message was posted some months ago so it might be a while till she logs in again. In the meantime I do hope you wil join us, there is plenty of support and online friendship here and lots of chat about different topics.

I see you just joined yesterday. Have you managed to have a look around the site?

You say your son is going through a difficult stage at the moment. I am sorry to hear that you feel isolated with this, we seem to have a few members with boys the same age as yours so it might help to chat to them

Posted on: April 1, 2010 - 7:26am

Anna

Parenting specialist

Hi celestejane, welcome to One Space, single parenthood can feel very lonely especially when our children are playing up.

How is your son? Is he becoming difficult at home? School? On the streets?

Posted on: April 1, 2010 - 9:39am

Rachael89

Hi im rachael 21 yr old from bolton, i am not a single mum but this is the only site i have found helpfull so far. I am always with my son and boyfriend when he finishes work and i feel isolated and lonley as me and my boyfriend dont really spend much time together, i dont have any friends only acquaintances so i am contanstly with my son and at times feel like im going crazy lol, i did have a best friend but she didnt really turn out to be a friend after all and i lost most of friends because of her, i just need someone to talk to to share problems and have a chat n laugh if there is anyone out there in a same situation as me please dont hesitate to message me. Thanks :)

Posted on: January 25, 2011 - 10:21am

Louise

Parenting specialist

Hello you are welcome, I have just been chatting to you on the thread you have started (I am really glad you did this) Hope you will stay with us and find some online company and support

Posted on: January 25, 2011 - 12:49pm

sparklinglime

Hi Rachael89.

This board is good company.

Posted on: January 25, 2011 - 6:04pm