I have one of those tape recorders that tapes calls.
Ex was told in a mediation meeting that I was going to record his calls after a particularly and weird set of calls only a couple of weeks after I'd left. He just denied them all...
I told my friends anyway, as the tape cut in automatically with calls, but only calls made to/from The Git were kept.
Not used now as he will only text me. He will not respond to any contact from me.
Ok, well I can only tell you what Oftel say, as per the link, and reiterate that independent legal advice is needed. I am not a lawyer.
A legal adviser is something that was being looked into a while ago by SPAN. I think it might be optimistic to expect people to work for nothing, though.
As for my early start, I always wake up early and like to come on the boards then if possible, as later in the day can be more hectic with my other work and meetings etc. I go to bed pretty early though.
Sparkling lime, it sounds as if your children's dad was disoncerted by the recordings!
I know that 5 years ago, at the time my Mum was dying, there was a lot of conflict between my sister and I. For some uncanny reason, I found out that on the day my Mum died, my sister was following me around taping me and my conversations in my house. Without going through the awfully long story, I had to seek out a solicitor, and I mentioned the tape recording. She told me it was illegal as I had no knowledge of it at the time it had been done.
Children's dad stopped answering the phone when he met The Gittess. He wasn't put off by recording, which was 6 years ago.
Hi Sy, thankyou. I guess most of us have BIG fall outs with family at sometime or other. Mine is quite a long story, but I will try and cut it short. 3 years before my Mum died, she was very poorly. The Drs didn't think she would make it. I had been her carer for a number of years by then. I come from a large family, 9 children! I didn't have a social life whatsoever. I felt like I couldn't leave my Mum as she had a lung disease, and sometimes couldn't breathe properly. Anyhow, on a couple of occassions I would ask if someone from the 'family' could come and sit with her. I was told No, they were either too busy, or felt she could be left. In the end I didn't bother. This time when she fell ill, the whole lot of them moved in, (thinking she was dying). I was relieved of all duties, taking care of her, cooking etc. I put it down to guilt. Anyhow, this went on from the December until the February. No sign of them moving out, which was causing major problems for me. My Mum made a great recovery, and she had heard all sorts so she told them to go. As she pointed out, she was ill, not ruddy deaf!!!! That was the beginning of 2002. I gave birth to my son in the September of that year, and carried on caring for my Mum (forgot to say I had always lived there). The imbeciles refused to speak to me once all that had happened. Some refused to speak to my Mum too. In 2005 when I realised that she wasn't going to make it, she didn't want the 'so called family' coming to see her. Her mind was sometimes mixed up due to lack of oxygen, so 3 weeks before she died, I persuaded her to let them come and spend time with her. This they did, and they were OH SO POLITE to me. She told me to be very wary of this, (which of course I was). They'd never set eyes on my son before who by then was 2 and a half. I tried hard to keep him away from them, but this was very difficult, as my Mum wanted me by her side the whole time. The day after she died, my son had been taken out, I went to sleep for a while, and when I woke, it was to them wandering round the house. I immediately ordered them out, they refused. I left, my nephew (thankfully) came. I got my son and went to a neighbour. Nephew rang me to say they were ransacking the house, taking whatever they wanted. I gave them 5 mins to get out of the house, or else I would call the police. You should have seen them scurrying away, hehe. The funeral took place, and that was the last I've seen of them. They did try and take me to court for things they wanted out of the house, but my solicitor said they weren't entitled to anything, as it was me that had always lived there. A very long story Sy. Very sad too. One good thing to come out of it though was one sister I hadn't spoken too before my Mum's death is now in regular contact :) I'm guessing the others felt so much guilt, they could have done so much more. My neighbour (mums best friend) thinks they are despicable, and as she says, they tried all ways to drag me down, but I've always managed to pull myself from the brink. Ruddy hard, but I'm still fighting (just)
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Gosh alisoncam, thank you for sharing that, it sounds dreadful though and no wonder you have lost touch with so many of them, after that behaviour.
You have built your own little family now. You should be very proud!
Thankyou Louise. Just before my Mum died, she told me that all I needed was C, she wanted me to move away from the area (because of the so called family). As it turned out, I couldn't follow through with what she wanted. I needed to be near those who meant a lot to my Mum and Dad, (our neighbours), so I literally moved across the road. Pure luck of course. Some days it is sad looking across, but other days, I'm so glad I'm nearby. The best news is that the others upped and left the area, miles away, so hip hip horray is what I say!!!
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Hi Helen T, thankyou. It's wierd that the thread started about recordings should stir up these things. Not complaining at all Sy hehehe, and I don't mind you being nosey in the least!!!
How are you Helen? Are the family watching the footie? My son (7) and I have it on, but I'm not really interested to be honest. How about you?
Hope you have a good evening. Take care.
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Sorry to hear that things have deteriorated, Pansy. You were anticipating that your daughter would say she wanted to come home but stick to your guns for the time being, you are just getting things on an even keel for you and the other two.
Why is her dad being so difficult? is he finding her hard to cope with, or is there some alcohol involvement? Is he being abusive to you and that's why you want to record the calls?
Hi Pansy, sorry to hear your ex is 'playing up' again. Perhaps he is now finding it stressful with your daughter full time!! It'll take time for them to adjust to the living arrangements again, and hopefully then, it'll sort itself out. Take care, enjoy the weekend, here's hoping it's a calm one for you.
Alison
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How did you know I have my imaginary glasses on? lol
Hope you are looking after YOU in the midst of all this, Pansy :-)
Your children's father seems to me to want to present himself as a "victim" of the situation whereas in fact he disappeared with this other woman with no warning. So often, if a person feels guilty, they find a way to make themsleves the victim to alleviate their guilt, and I guess his drinking will not help this process and will only make things more irrational.
Hopefully things will settle down a bit now!
Me? itching fingers? Surely not!
The law is quite woolly about it all and yes, you have to inform the other party you are recording if you intend to make the recording available to a third party. Here's an online guide to the legal position, although you will note that they recommend individual, independent legal advice.
www.retellrecorders.co.uk/legal/home.htm