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We have been together for 8 years, had our 1st baby in August and now I am left alone with the baby. My partner is living with another woman and she left us in debt and has no real feelings for the baby. What is the chance that she will be allowed to see the baby on a regular basis and be called his mummy as clearly she isn't interested. All is just words, no actions...
Hi Louise,
thanks for posting :)
I am the birth mother and i went trough hell to have the baby, but just to be more dificult my partner started an affair when baby was 2 months old. At the moment i have mixed feelings weather she should see the baby cos she says she loves him, but didn't spend Christmas with us and a lot of times she says she will come to see him always something else comes up and is more important or she just need time for her new life?!?!
I have some support but evenings are hard. During the day i am occupied with the baby and go see friends, trying to sort out our life....
Once i told her that I am not going to allow her to see the baby and just to make a statment she said she will take me to court. We are in a civil partnership which i will take steps to end in the new year. But she did not just left, she came back 4 times with promisses to be family and etc.. and 3 days after each return, she was leaving again. I tought I live in a soup opera.
But the reality is that I am alone with the baby, a lot of bills and a loan to pay and no support. I hope that she will atleast keep her promise to be coming 3 nights a week to look after him at night time so i can get some sleep.
Yes, the lack of sleep is a real killer. Do try and cat nap when the baby dozes in the daytime, it is worth "training" yourself to do this as it will come in very handy in the years to come (believe me)
Ok I think you need some legal advice. But first of all are you on maternity leave or not working at the moment? Just making sure you claim what you can.
If your partner has Parental Responsibility for your son then you can claim Child Support from her. We have various experts available on this board, legal, money and Child Support experts may be useful to you in this instance. See here (Ask the Expert on the right hand side)
Have you got a decent Health Visitor? She can tell you about things in your area where you can meet other parents, or you could look here to find your local Childrens Centre which has events and groups for families with children under five.
Thanks for the advice Louise. Have a great day!
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Hi Amargo
I hope you're able to catch up on sleep when he's having naps. That was the bit that kept me going when my lot were small.
hiya amargo
i dont think having an ex stay over 3 nights a week is a healthy realistic situation to put yourself through.. call her bluff about access through the court and then you'll see excactly what shes made of concerning the baby..
wheres the dad?? was it artificial?
Hello Amargo
Welcome to One Space. It must be tough coping with a four moth old baby on your own, do you have any help from family and friends?
I am wondering about whether your ex-partner has Parental Responsibility for your baby? Are you the parent who gave birth? If so, you automatically have PR and if your ex partner was not the birth mother, she would have to apply to court to obtain Parental Responsibility, whether you were in a civil partnership or unmarried. Once she had PR, she could then go through the legal process to obtain parenting time with the child.....that is if you could not agree it between the two of you. How are you feeling about this at the moment?