Hi my name is claire i have a 9yr old daughter and have always been a single mum. I passed my driving test last july which is my proudest momemt (second to having my daughter obviously). I was on benifits from the time i fell pregnant age 17 untill i secured my first (proper lol) job at the end of january this year. I am to be honest finding adjustment from being a full time mum to a part time working mum difficult as is my daughter. but am still enjoying the satisfaction i get from working.
Hi clairstar, well done you on getting a job! Thats fantastic! It is good to be out in the real world talking to adults and finding that you are useful to others, not just family members!
I completely understand you when you say that you are finding is difficult. When I started work part time, I was exhausted, however I found my feet and things got better.
How does your daughter find it difficult?
Hi Claire
Well done on passing your driving test. I can imagine how happy you felt. I hope you're enjoying your work.
Good to 'see' you here and look forward to chatting.
Thanx guys.
I volunteerd at pounland before i got this job but was able to fit this in around my daugter.Now im working from 8:00 till 4:30 i leave at 7 and get home around 5.
I am cotracted at 3 days a week but regulary do 4or5. On my days off she refuses to go to school, i always get her there but its hard.
I am enjoying work and i always feel tired, but im sure both me and my girl will get used to it.
Welcome clairestar
Hmm that is a challenge for you, if your daughter is unwilling to go to school...have you got to the bottom of what that's all about? Is it something to do with lucky mum is staying at home and I want to do that too?
Well done on the job! I agree with Anna, it is massively tiring at first, it does sound a long day for you. Does your daughter go to an out of school club in the mornings?
She goes to school fine on days i work and walks herself as we live minutes from the school. So yes Louise i think its just about staying home with me. Mum is there mornings im not, and my girl leaves for school at 8:15 as she does extra classes.
I am off today and she went to school fine this morning, but thats only because she wants to go to a friends this evening, which i said depended on her behaviuor...
Hi clairestar, I am presuming you have had the discussion about how important school is and also you both have jobs, yours is to earn some money and hers is to go to school.
Do you get any time at the weekend where it is just the two of you, or is your attention diverted to your mum or brothers?
Hi clairestar, Just a suggestion...on the schooldays you are not actually going to work, why not pretend you are but have a later start, and leave five minutes before she does, walk around the block a bit and then go home? Anna's solution is the sensible one, she DOES need to understand that everyone has their own "job" but maybe a bit of subterfuge would help just while she is in this phase?
Thanks for the suggestion Louise 
Hi Anna, yes i've had that talk. She hasnt grasped it completley as she says that before i worked we did fine for money... This is just because i didnt really let her see me struggle.
We spend lots of time together at weekends, although she finds it hard to fit me in lol she had four birthday party's this weekend all of which i drove her to and stayed at. This has taken its toll as after i got to work today mum called to say my girl is ill. I feel terrible for not being there and im now thinking what will i do iff this happens after mums gone?
Presumably your mum wont live too far away and would still be able to babysit?
Of course there are pros and cons to having your mum living at home, perhaps you could write these up and see which one outweighs the other?
You will find a way of dealing with when your daughter is ill and you are working, we all do!
Thank you Anna.
No mum shouldnt be too far away.
Was a bit upset as its a first for me not being there for her. Also this seems to be happening all too often latley and have put it down to "growing pains" as my mother used to call them. She is rather tall for her age and seems to be "blossoming" far earlier than i did and is constantly complaining of "stomach aches low down." This is also why i am motivated to sort out the living arraingments so she has her own space.
Ps Anna you are now my go to person for reassurance you are good at this lol
Hi clairestar,
Thankfully as children get older they tend not to get sick so much, i remember that feeling of guilt especially when i had taken them to school knowing they were not a hundred percent.
Children do seem to be maturing younger these day's and getting taller either that or i'm shrinking!!
Do they have after school activities at your daughters school?
Hi Sally.
Guilt i would say is one of the hardest things for parents. so i try not to beat myself up...
So true, My friends daugter of 8 just began her cycle which i found shocking, her poor mother..
I am 5'7 and her father is an inch taller so i knew she wouldnt be short, but she comes up to my armpit area (nice reference point) and wears size 4 shoes. My daughter and a lot of the girls i see her age are growing up way to fast. i constantly have to ague with her about cloths shoes and make up and get told that all her freinds are allowed. I didnt realise this would all come so soon.
Her school run alot of activities before and after school. She attends maths and literacy groups every morning and one day after school but is not intrested in joining any of the other.
Hi Clairestar, children are hitting puberty a lot earlier these days, I reckon, and as well as "teens" there seems to be another group emerging which can be called TWEENS and starts about 9 or 10 and this sounds like your girl. Just a thought, have you had a chat to her about periods etc so it does not take her by surprise?
Hi Louise , Yes i've had the talk and we talk regulary. I think im more worried then she is, because as i said i thouht i had a few more years. Maybe a new discussion on TWEENS?
Good luck with that conversation clairestar, i was lucky my tween has older sisters which has made it easier to have these discussions as they are able to tell it from their perspective, and as the older ones are close in age i was able to have this discussion with them both at the same time, which seemed to take some of the pressure of me.
Ah new discussion about tweens and puberty, that sounds a good idea!
You might like to look at this thread (click) which is how another member is coping with her two daughters.
There is also some interesting information here (click) which could help when chatting with your tween in general.
Hello clairestar and welcome to One Space
Welldone on passing your driving test last year, it's something that i keep putting off.
It can take awhile to get into a good routine, are there any areas that you are finding more difficult than others?
Other users may be able to offer you some useful tips!!