Please read this and then tell me what you think xxxx
I get wat ur sayin bout if summit happened, i dnt think i cud live wiv myself if nwt else, my kids are my pride n joy n im v protective of them so i do no this is best. I luv my girls more than out in this world n wud do anything for them so i no i hav to do this. This situation is jus v distressing n upsetting for them and me. N i do still love him v much even tho i dnt no why n it hurts to do this. I no hes in charge of hid own destiny bt i still care bwt him n dnt like to think hes upset, even tho hes all bwt himself. All i can think of is six months ago things were great n we were happy then wen i fell pregnant n it started again n now im here n i dnt no how. N that Mr wrong thing i can totally relate to, he did all those things ova than sleeping wiv my friends bt th werd thing is he started out ad all th things as Mr right until i fell pregnant wiv our first baby. It would be nice to find a man who is genuinely like Mr right, my friend has been wiv her fella for twenty three years n he is lovely to her, he treats her wiv so much respect that i am in awe of them. They hav raised three wonderful kids together n they are th perfect family n i want to turn th clock bak six yrs n wish id picked sumone like him to be my kids dad x
Iv jus re read that Mr wrong n saw it says seduced anyone, not jus friends so i guess he did all of them after all lol x
I know you are hurting and everything you are feeling is perfectly normal, you have children with this man and you do care about him.
Can I ask how long you were together before you were pregnant with your 1st child?
xxx
Do you know what, if hindsight was foresight then we would all live in a perfect world, no one would be hungry, everyone would be with their perfect partner we would all have perfect children xxx
I cant stay too long tonight as I have the dreaded jobcentre in the morning
I asked how long you were together before you were pregnant to see if you had been together a length of time and if you had got to know each other well, you did say your ex has been in and out of prison whilst the children have been little so have the good times been when he first gets released, if you think back to the good times maybe you will see a pattern like that, is it when he is not drinking as heavily?
I hope you will read the mr right mr wrong again over the coming days/weeks and when you feel a little down just remember how many wrong boxes he ticks regardsless of how it started out, most relationships if not all go through a period of euphoria, this is how this type of man works, he is nice to you and gains your trust, once he has that he can do mostly whatever he likes because we think we love them.
xxx
Glad you've been to the solicitor.
It's all a shock at the mo, mixed with sadness and anger. Slowly, you'll get there.
We were only together six months before we got pregnant with C. We had known each ova since we were fifteen bt had drifted apart to get on wiv our own lives until we met up again wen we were almost twenty n got together. He was alwsys a gentleman to me before we got pregnant so i didnt get any warning n by that point i was sucked in. N god yeah i no, hindsight is a good thing sometimes but it cant do anything for u. If i knew then wat i no now i wudnt hav gone near him bt i think life is full of things like that n i guess thats how we learn. N my children are defas nt perfect, sometimes they work themselves summit chronic bt theres nwt id change cos even tho they can be little buggers they are lovely little girls, they are so kind and carin and friendly, they are always smiling n they always there for a cuddle if u need one, even if sometimes i yav to pin them to get one cos they get sik of me lol x
Its funny u say that as i hav noticed th patterns, everything is great wen hes released but after about eight months it starts n he goes bak in. He writes begging me to stand by him n says he loves me n hel change n i hav given him chance after chance cos his families always in my ear that he needs me n he Wont cope in there wivout my support so i stand by him. Hes only violent wen hes drunk bt hes verbally abusive al th time. I no hes treated me badly cos iv let him n by takin him bak iv given th msg he can get away wiv anything bt i no now im worth more than this n more than him. I no in th long run hel end up bak inside n il be th one who has a good life so i hold onto that. I think iv thort i needed him rather than wanted him n thats my low self esteem, so i no iv got to work on that. N i no how u feel bwt th jobcentre, its awful havn to go there, i hate it as well. Bt i suppose needs must n all that x
I know i will, i know its gna get harder before it gets beta, think i need to toughen up x
Hello kirstybellx
There is a lot to get your head round right now but you are right: you have to think of the girls and your new baby. As you say, every time you take him back you give him the message that the abuse is OK.
Did you phone women's aid?
Hi kirstybellx,
I hope you got some rest last night? I am off to jobcentre in 15 mins so I`ll catch up properly with you later, hope your day goes ok xxx
Hiya kirstybellx
OK, thats interesting, your solicitor says you must stop all contact. You need to listen to her, yes its scary, but you are doing all of you a favour. You need to be careful though as abusive men can become more aggressive when a woman finally decides to take control of her life. Therefore YOU MUST find support.
I can read tiredmums desperation and feel it myself kirstybellx.... PLEASE ring Womens Aid, RIGHT NOW.
You will get advice and understanding.....you need professional involvement kirstybellx, no-one can get out of this situation on their own. This is serious and it is time to face the truth.
I think there are quite a few of us how have had children with violent and aggressive individuals. You will get through it as tiredmum says. I understand that you want to be a family, however your girls wellbeing (and your own) must come first and actually once you make that decision, life becomes your own again.
I also want to say its fine that you come on and spill the beans to us, we have been there and come out the other side. You don't need to ask how everyone is, however the fact you do, shows that you are a compassionate person who in times of crisis, can still consider other people.
Please in this instance, just stop and think what you would be advising your best friend to do and go and do it......you know what it is......call 0800 2000 247, its open 24 hours so no excuses.
I look forward to hearing how it goes.
Hi kirstybellx
How has your day been? How are you feeling today is little bundle still kicking like a good un?
I do hope you have read Anna`s post, we are worried about you and want you to have support that is physically there for you, sadly it is a fact that once you stand up to violent men they dont like it and can try to regain the control they feel they have lost, they do this with violence.
No one as I have said before can make you pick up the phone and call Womens aid but it will be one of the best calls you ever make.
Just think about this for a min, once you make that call, you are on the way to a new and so much better life for you and for your children. I have been where you are and there wasnt a one space for me, I lost my whole family because of the manipulation he used, when I left all I had were the clothes I stood up in, £20, 6 nappies and a tin of cow and gate milk, 3 children one 4 weeks old in her pram, it was so scary not having anywhere to go but the refuge and I hadnt called them I didnt know you needed to so I ended up at the Police station in the town I had travelled to only to be told by the person on the desk that there was no room at the refuge and I should go back to where I came from and try again another day!!! I like you was not in a good place, my emotions were all over the place, crying one min laughing the next, what should I do 3 young children and nowhere to go so I have to go back, it cost me the only £20 I had to get back in a taxi, I stayed up all night ironing,I was too scared to sleep, sent my little boy to school as normal in the morning as I worked out that I would be watched like a hawk, took my 2 daughters to the shop and met a wonderful neighbour who said her husband would help by driving me back to the town, they called the school and arranged for my son to be ready the second we arrived in the middle of all this the ex decided to take my toddler daughter for a walk, that was awful as I couldnt work out if he knew my plan and was takingher to stop me leaving, when he came back my neighbour came up and asked if the girls could go to her house to see the bird they had in a cage, I managed to go to and from there we ran to the school, my friends husband drove round in his car we grabbed my son and threw the pram into the back of the car not folded as it was an estate car and as we got in the car the ex was running down the road, we drove away!!!!!!!!
I did get into the refuge that day and was there for 3 months till they gave me a lovely house.
It was the worst time but do you know something I have never for one second regretted leaving, I have helped other ladies over the years by talking to them helping them to make a plan to escape, keeping a change of clothes for them, and also making sure they got anything irreplaceable out an item at a time, like baby pics for example, my ex burned all of my 2 girls baby pics and they can never be replaced.
I hope that for you you can find the strength to break free and that in years to come you will remember and when you come across someone who needs your help you will give them the benefit of your experience, like the film pay it forward.
I have told you my story in the shortest version possible in the hope that it will give you hope for the future xxx
I just want you and your children to be safe and happy xxx
Oh wow that must hav been really hard for u. I know u must hav been pretty desperate to go thru that. Did he leave u alone after that? I think its amazin that u hav cum thru that n are usin ur experience to help others. N i know that men like this use violence after theyl lost control, my ex is exactly that man n altho im pretty confident we safe now i no how he works, he lets things fester in his head then flies into a rage. I havnt managed to ring womens aid cos iv been wiv my girls all day so waitn till they off to bed before i do it. My babies been going crackers today, think shes in training to be a gymnast wiv all th flipping n flopping she doin lol im kind of ok today, hes text me bt nwt nasty so im nt stressed out. I feel sort of wierd to be honest, like a bit numb, hws u feeling? I cant believe ur ex destroyers ur memories, thats a horrid thing to do n a bit sick. Luckily for memy ex has got all my girls photos n has kept them for me. They are very precious so i know wat ur ex did must hav really hurt x
N i understand wat u saying Anna, iv had friends in this situation n iv told them exactly wat u are all sayin to me. It hurts me go see friends of mine go thru this so i know how i must hav made my friends feel seein me put up wiv it. I will get help from womens aid soon as these two are off th floor cos i no th day will cum wen he comes looking for me. I will sort it out honestly x
Hi kirstbellx, it didnt end straight away but the Police were brilliant.
I am glad you have had an ok day todday and your little bump is being active!!!!!!!!
You will go through many different emotions before this is done, you will have good days and bad ones but the bad ones will lessen and the good ones will become more xxx
Yes losing the pics almost destroyed me and has made it hard for my girls over the years when say they had a school project and needed a baby pic, they were the only ones who didnt have any.
Please do make that call tonight it will change your life xxx
I`ll be here till quite late tonight as its Fri, I tend to pop on and off but will be here if you want to chat xxx
Iv jus tried to ring womens aid bt didnt realise its nt free from a mobile so gna hav to wait til th mora cos got no cred on my phone. Thats good that th police helped u, theres too many ppl quick to slate th police bt like i always say if u need help they are th first ones there. I cant imagine hw hard it was for u to lose ur pics cos they are memories, altho i bet u hav made loads more memories that are happier ones. N yes, bump is certainly makin her presence felt lol my friend says i shud take reassurance from that as she represents th future. After all th stress she is hangin on in there, she must be so strong jus like my girls. I am havn gud days n bad days bt i can see a way forward now. Th initial shock has worn off n altho more stress has been created i know one day it will all be ova, n il be able to laugh again without bein brought bak down x
Please do call them again tomorrow, well done for trying tonight xxx
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZBR2G-iI3-I
I want you to sing along xxx
It wnt let me view it cos am on mobile web bt i luv that song, i sang it on my eighteenth birthday n won two bottles of champers so this song has always been a fav of mine. Il tell u wat i find a really good empowering song, hav u heard fighter by Christina aguilera? It was on th ova day n it jus made me feel beta. I like music, it cheers me up n theres nwt beta than listening to ya fav tunes wile doin th housework. Mind thats wen i get chance, wen my oldest hasn got her pink or Katy Perry on lol x
Music is a great tool for expressing how you feel, yes I have heard fighter good song, I love music of all types from classical to very heavy rock xxx
You will sing it again soon and will win far more than champagne xxx
Yeah i agree, i like mostly pop n dance stuff. Nt so much stuff from nowdays tho cos it al sounds th same. My kids like lady gaga bt wev had to ban it from th Tele cos theyv started copying th dance moves n sum are a bit rude for little ones cos they dnt realise wat they are doin lol n i hope i will, altho i dnt think ppl will be ready for my Bridget Jones style slaughter of it this time lol x
ha ha, wait till they are teens like mine, although I have to say they do like lots of the older stuff as I have always had music on in the house, my 16 year old daughter used to sing a lot as a little girl, Whitney Houston Run to you and Gabrielles Sunshine, she once entered a talent comp and did very well, she hasnt sung for a while as she was assaulted by a woman of the 28 coming up 3 years ago in July, it went to court and was dealt with, my daughter is now starting to sing again.
We used to do the sing-a-long to sound of music and sister act, great fun xxx
We always have music on here - different decades too, as my lot don't mind the music I grew up with.
Random dancing around the kitchen (well, tends to be on one spot nowadays, but can still flap arms madly about), and they may not join in anymore, but it does make them laugh...
Hope today will be a calm day.
Did u say ur daughter was assaulted by a 28 yr old woman three yrs ago? Thats awful! N i hope it was dealt wiv harshly! She shudnt let anything knock her confidence if she enjoys singin, wat a shame its takin her three yrs to move on from that. Its horrible to be attacked, i was attacked a yr ago, it was two days before mothers day n a group of thirty lads n lasses jumped me n my sister in th street. I was left wiv a broken arm n cheekbones n my sis needed plastic surgery to repair her mouth as they ripped it from th inside out all along her cheek. I cudnt leave th house for months n developed a fear of gangs. Wat made it humiliatin is i was 27 n th group were all aged 18 to 20. Th police did nothin in th end cos our witness was too scared to give a statement n there was no cctv so all they could do was caution three of them who a woman had confirmed were there. I wudnt care bt this gang hav a reputation for doin this so will Di it again. N my two like older stuff as well, they like elo n th beautiful south cos Mr n my ex always had them on lol x
I think its good for u to whack sum music on n dance around n good for th kids to see u carrying on. My two luv it cos i put th blues brothers song on, go out th room, put sunglasses on n then poke my head around th door in time wiv th music then run in doin mad dancin n chuck mesel round th furniture like a spy wud, my girls go crazy for it n end up nearly blue wiv laughing lol cant do it at mo tho cos pregnant bt its a good laugh. My ex used to make me do it ova n ova again, think it was more cos he liked it, cos i can do it completely straight faced lol
Yes, the do need to see life carries on... Have to say I've never regreted leaving - even with losing everything, I wouldn't change a thing.
Hi kirstybellx, hope you are ok tonight, did you make your call today?
Hope tomorrow is a good day for you xxx
Hi there girls, tiredmum, I am so sorry to hear about the attack on your daughter that must have been an horrific time for both of you. Obviously you have done all you can to support her through it and its lovely to hear that she is singing again.
Thanks for sharing your story too, unbelieveable that the police told you to go back home, you must have been petrified! I think that the Police have changed quite a lot over the last few years regards to domestic abuse. They are a lot more trained up on how to support survivors, as are judges and CAFCASS (supposedly). I hope that had you turned up with all your children in tow and probably very obviously in need of escape that, today, the Police would find you temporary accommodation, or transport you to the nearest available refuge......Little fact, did you know that there are only 200 refuges in the UK - shocking huh!
kirstybellx - how are you doing? I was also horrified to read about the assault that you and your sister encountered, how distressing for you. How is your sister coping?
I know what you mean about the up and down days, it is such a strange place to be in when you know that you should shut down all correspondence, feeling and emotion from the man that you have spent years loving, have pride in yourself and move forward into the future without him, however it can be so painful and you can feel so helpless and at a loss.
I have recently done some training around post traumatic stress. It is now beginning to be recognised that people who have survived Domestic Violence go through the same emotional trauma as war veterans or kidnap victims and can experience symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
Meaning that if you have been in fear for your safety or your life, your stress and anxiety levels can rocket and stay very unstable for a long time ....I could have told them that! As I am sure tiredmum could too! It was very interesting and I just wanted to share that with you, so that you recognise that all that you are feeling at the moment is completely normal. Did you have a good mothers day??
Iv just rang womens aid n to be honest im disappointed, she didnt offer any support ova than a refuge in middlesborough which is miles away from my friends n family n it means i still wudnt be able to settle th kids in a school n i prob will hav this baby before i find q house. I cant put them or mesel thru all that. She even asked me to ring bak on Mon so i still feel on my own wiv no one to help. I left my partner six wks ago thinking i wud be offered help n support yet no one seems to want to know n im havn to do it al mesel, th only way for me to find a home is to go private n iv found one but i hav to raise 1300 pound to get in n i havnt got that kind of money, does anyone know another way?
I am surprised and disappointed that you did not get more help from Women's Aid. At the very least I would have expected them to put you in contact with your local office and arrange for their Outreach worker to come and meet you. What about contacting the local office on 0191 454 8257? They might not be there till Monday now but if you leave a message then they will have to ring you back.
I have been doing a bit of digging around. I do think you have priority housing needs with having the children with you as well as expecting a new baby and escaping a violent home. The South Shields Citizen's Advice Bureau will help you put in an application for Local Authority Housing (where you will not need a bond). Their number is 08944 499 4715 and they are open 10-1 on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, you will need to ring and make an appointment, explain your situation over the phone. I know it is hard, you would have thought there would be more help availble and really it does involve a lot of trailing around on your part but it sounds to be as if it is the next thing to do, better to apply for housing with their support as they can advise you of the right approach.
I'm sorry that they've not been able to offer the support! That's really sad.
I hope that on Monday that you do get something more positive.
Thinking of you.
Hi kisrtybellex
I do hope you are ok and are not going to give up. remember I didnt and I dont want you to either
Ok your local Police station should be able to give you the number for their domestic violence team, please do call them, there are new things in place from when I was leaving such as panic alarms, safe rooms etc, they will also have access to your ex`s criminal records and will see that you really do need help right now.
I am going to attach a link to a page for all the womens aid help, as I dont know exactly where abouts you live it is an a-z of their services so you scroll down to find your town city etc, in many areas there is what is called the butterfly project this is where you can receive councelling and lots of support so please see if there is one in your area, if not then ask where the nearest one is and tell them you need their support.
http://www.womensaid.org.uk/azrefuges.asp
I know you dont want to go to Middlesborough to the refuge but is there one nearer to you that might be full right now, if so would you consider going to Middlesborough just for a short time and saying to them that please would they put you in the nearest one as soon as a place became available. I know it means an upheavel for the children but you have to look at this as a temporary thing and one that is possibly right for you right now.
I totally agree with Louise that you will be at the highest priority for rehousing and even if its the bidding system you would be red banded which puts you up at the top of the lists.
Please please dont give up, you can do this and it makes me so sad that this person at the end of the phone didnt help you.
I will have another look and see what else I can find.
Thinking of you and sending you a big hug xxx
Also some housing associations do have emergency temporary houses, they are not publisized but they do exist, call all of your housing associations in the area and either talk over the phone or make an appt to go and see them, most housing associations also have tenant support workers which if you were to receive emergency housing they would then support you.
Some of them also have houses that are already furnished and have all white goods ready, all you need are pots and pans etc, this too is a good thing as it means that someone who has to leave quickly and has nothing at least has a start, I do think there is a small charge on top of the rent for this and probably isnt covered by housing benefit but still worth exploring xxx
Kirstybellex, how are you today?
Is little bump still as active, are you managing to get some rest xxx
i am going through the same as you my partner hit me while i was pregnant with our son and took money from me while i was pregnant,he also left me to go through 24 hours of labour on my own and didnt even come up to see our son when he was born.he denies our son is his and my little boy is coming six .i went to a womens refuge for a while and then came back and wished i had not,believed he would change,but they never do even for their children .two years ago my son was in intensive care fighting for his life and he still wasnt their for him,please if he tells you he will change he wont.please give you and your girls the life you deserve,it will be hard but it will be worth it and your children will thank you for it,your chidren can be happy with one parent or miserable with two.it wasnt till i left i have realised the scars it has left on my six year old son.womens aid is great not only have they gave me counselling but they have helped my son as well,all my wishes and stay safe a fellow survivor love hellen,hope to talk soon
Thanks nellie77, for your input, you have been very brave to get out of the relationship and to face up to it for what it is, that is one of the hardest things, we think it can't be THAT bad and of course sometimes they seem nice so we stay with them, or go back to them and the best thing to do is face up to how they are behaving and get out!
How are you, Kirstybellx?
Sory not been on for ages, its been hard wk. Iv lost th house i was hopin id get. My ex came round last wk n told me hes with sumone else properly then tried to sleep wiv me so my head was mashed, then yest i found out he slept wiv my friend wile i was goin thru th pain of a miscarriage. Then he came onto me again wen i got upset after he told me. So Im not copin too well. Im struggling to let go cos Im missin my old life, my routine n my home. Hes sold all my things so i have nothin left. Im not copin at all, n i feel like Im drownin. I cant see a way out of this n nobody will help me ova than my friends n sister n theres only so much they can do. N nellie thats awful, i can totally relate. Its great u got away. My ex used to take my money n lock me n our baby in th flat we had at th time. I think sum men are jus control freaks n stop seein u as a person, n more of a slave n a possesion. I met my ex at macdonalds to talk bwt th kids n he didnt bring any money so i said well il get it n his response was yeah u will, so i said Im nt here to feed u, n he answered wiv yeah u are n u will pay for it, bt he said it really nasty n thats wen i saw hes always gna try n control ppl.
N is ur son ok now? I dnt understand why they dnt feel th same for our kids as we do. I know its nt th same as u but my daughter had fits wen she was eight months old n was in hospital for four days n he didnt cum. I had to ask th hosp for milk n clothes for th bairn n they were great. I cudnt leave her side to go get sum stuff so i was showerin in jus water n puttin dirty clothes bak on. I rang him to ask if hed bring stuff for us bt he jus didn turn up. He missed my youngests birth as well so i sympathise wiv u there as well, i went thru labour in tears cos he wasnt there n i felt all alone at a vulnrable time. I dnt know why they do this n i dnt think id want to know why. N thanks for th lovely comments tiredmum, n i wnt give up. I feel like i want to but il try. Its jus so hard n wiv my hormones im struggling to see clearly n im angry n emotional all th time. I jus want summit gud to happen, jus once thats all. I jus feel so low n let dwn that Im nt sure iv got th strength to do it much longer. I suffer bouts of depression, i hav my whole life n i normally manage mesel apart from wen i had pnd, n i can feel myself slipping again. I dnt want to cos i no its wat my ex wants so Im tryin to keep my chin up, altho at th min its difficult x hows u?
Hi kirstybellx. Really sorry you've lost the house you were after. Don't give up though, something will turn up. As for your ex, he is messing with your head as you know. Your sister and your friend can do more than you think, just by talking to them helps doesn't it? They know what you're going through, and are there to support you. Finding out he slept with a friend as you were going through such an awful time losing a baby must have been devastating. Did he tell you? If he did, then he said it to get a reaction out of you, and it was down right cruel of him.
Words fail me.
I'm so sorry that you've lost the house kirstybell..
Please take care.
Hi kirstybellex, I`m sorry its still so difficult for you but you are stronger than you think arent you, I have just read your other post on the other thread and good for you!!!!!!!!!!!
Please do keep letting us know how you are getting on, we are all willing you on xxxx
Thanks. I hav another viewing on tues so hopefully that goes well n yeah talking helps a lot. They are great n they are helping a lot. N yes he told me himself, it really really hurt n his excuse was he was really drunk. Wen i lost th baby i needed him n he was off doin that. N to make it worse th lass lived next door to me n our kids were in same class. N she became my friend knowing wat they had done. I know hes messin wiv me n it hurts that he thinks that little of me. I think hes doin it to make me fêel down so my depression will cum bak. I jus feel let down by him n stupid for lettin him waste so much of my life x
Good luck for Tues, please let us know how it goes xxx
You stay strong xxx
Oh it feels neva endin. I shud jus bugger off n nt contact him but th guilt of him begging me to meet him to talk bout th kids jus got too much. My sister n friends think Im torturin myself so Im not gna meet him again. Im fine until i see him. N i know Im stronger, i jus hav weak days but like i said, i didnt think id even get to this point six wks ago. N im gna try my hardest to sort everything else out cos if i dnt get anywhere soon Im gna scream lol x hows u doin?
You are doing great, I think you have come a long way i just a few weeks so just think how far you can go xxx
I do think your sister and friends have apoint especially when as you say yourself you are doing so well till you see him and he really isnt worth it is he xxx
I am fine thank you, well apart from the radiator on my car having a big hole in it, need to get that fixed asap as I dont do walking ha ha
For th first time i can say hes nt worth it. N u no th best part, after he tried to kiss me i pushed him off n felt strong enuf to tell him how i felt. I told him i was worth more than him n i deserve beta than him n he hung his head n said i know u do. So i got a bit closure n god it felt gud to say it n mean it lol altho i got straight on train out way of him before he cud take that feeling away. N thats why i dnt drive, cars are always knackun up n are too expensive. I use public transport, n for all its a bit off its cheap lol x
I am so proud of you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WELL DONE xxx
Remember that feeling when you feel down it is very empowering xxx
Hi kirstybellx,
I am fine thank you.
I am glad you went to the solicitor, I do understand it wasnt pleasant but you have done the right thing.
Your solicitor is right at the moment with your ex`s behaviour you cant risk your childrens safety not for a minute, as I said to you if somethng happened and they looked at his history then they would ask you why you didnt protect your children. I know you can see that this is the right thing to do but the other part of you says but I still love him.
As you go through your journey to reslolve this you will find out all about love and how it is meant to be, there was a wonderful post on here about mr right and mr wrong, I will find it and re post it here for you, it will make you think I promise.
I cant tell you often enough, YOU have done nothing wrong please believe that, your ex is the master of his own destiny but he is not your master and you do not have to put up with his behaviour and niether do your children xxx
I will see if I can find the mr right mr wrong for you now I wont be long xxx