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Excellent support Shockedmum, thank you, I do hope abt finds all this useful to see that you can get through this, and keeps finding the fight within her.
Hi shockedmum
Your a star, very very usefull info thanks so much. been to see her today and they told me they don't know if i can see her tommorrow as social worker is away and he'd told them he is sorting it out. maybe he got my email so i will try get hold of him tommorrow but i'm not going to be fobbed off or treated like this any longer. i want answers and spend time with her real contact not supervised he has no order no police statement so he can't do it. it's wrong. every week i'm crying my eyes out and so is she. x couldn't even look me in the eyes and he just dragged her away.
going to print this info you given and use some whilst i'm writing my diary and future statements etc and my solicitor said she can help me next week when she gets back from holiday. alright for some isn't it i ain't had a holiday in 3 years
life is short and they are stealing our time, i am no longer in control of my life and destiny because of them. It's all wrong and shouldn't be allowed. Hypercrits saying she needs be protected when they are doing as much abuse as he has, letting him plus constantly questioning asking her where she wants to live. this has been 2 years in september she will be 7. sorry it all just makes me angry bitter and twisted
i want justice, i need justice my girl is my life without her i have nothing
i will let you know how it goes
xx
Yes Yes Yes,
Don't cry, He is doing you a favour by displaying this awfull behaviour and infront of the child.
That is hostility and not deemed in the best interest of the child by the courts.
Courts are very aware that prelonged court cases aren't beneficial and very stressfull for families so this goes in your favour, look on the bright side, It is policy not to prelong court cases and to get to a conclusion a.s.a.p and if this is frusterated as your ex has being doing then it does look very very bad on his part. There have been cases where residency have been switched over just for that.
However make note of time, date and location what was said how it has effected the child. So you remember it when writing a statement :)
Sending you hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Tx xxx
You're doing a sterling job, abt, arming yourelf with evidence is a great way forward. Try not to let his awful behaviour spoil your time with your girl.
i hope courts are aware tht prolpnged court cases are very stressfull,ive ad enuf, bin ayear goin thru court,sick of it, hi angry ope ur ok , doesnt seem fair dus it, these men love chaos, they dont care who they hurt even their own kids
my ex as prolonged court by delayin drug test,usein hair dye, so he as do another hair strand test,and usein half my legal aid while he does it,
Kiera have you noticed how child dispute cases go on for aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaages and then in the same breath you read its policy not to prelong court cases?
Scratching my head here.
Ugh i seriously hate men.
I am so damaged i don't know how i will go on to ever have a healthy relationship (sad face)
im same hun, hate my ex,hate myself for keep takin him back,my eldest dawter left cos of him, even now she upset bout it, how hell cud i of kept takin him bk,
It is very hard when the courts take so long to decide, what we already know, would be best for our children.
Shockedmum, don't hate men, its not worth it, there are some lovely guys out there and its not fair to tarnish them all with the same brush.
kiera, you may keep questioning why you kept taking him back, but one day in the future you will know the answer and forgive yourself.
Hi All
spoke to social worker and he said i can't see her yet all visits stopped cause x says no!!!! bloody ridiculas i asked why? he said x don't think it's a good idea and i told social to ask what the judge had said. at the end of the day x is making himself look bad and i will include this when i go to court.
Yes shockedmum i feel same it's put me off men and a lot i hate, i know theres a nice man out there but i'm not even ready to meet him yet. i gave all my love to a complete a***hole.
Kiera don't be hard on yourself why you took him back, i done same i listened to his promises of change, and making me feel sorry for him etc, theres lots reasons why you tried and you haven't done anything wrong only wanting love. he's lost and stupid
i realise my x is jelous of my daughters love for me, no matter how much he trys to bribe her she clearly loves and wants to be with me and he hates it, he couldn't even look me in the eyes cause he knows what he is doing is wrong, he's lonely and sad and wants her for company as well as it's a game he's playing which he wants to win, he wants to hurt me, and also he is feeling so cocky with himself thinking social and courts are on his side he thinks he's winning and so he's trying to get more and more of his own way, not happy with taking her from me but now stopping my contact, he can carry on digging a hole, one day soon he will fall in
if i don't end up in a nut house i'm trying to keep strong and my sanity but something surely has got to change in these court systems
abt xx
Hi abt i totally agree with you that the system needs to change though i can understand it from the professional perspective aswell in that you need to get lot's of evidence and people need to be assessed and reports written etc etc all the toing and throwing is really time consuming.
In the mean time it's a case of having to stay strong for a bit longer 
hi angry how are u, ope ur okxx
Hiya Guys..
I just got a copy of the court order dismissing the case.
and I thought i'd share something with you all.
I mentioned contiously how its to the detriment of a child to put pressure upon a mother as this would effect the capabilities of the mother to care for the child.
I was waffling on quite a bit however when i got the court order, the court have a word for this, and its very precise, I will quote, "The effects of this delay is having a PREJUDICIAL EFFECT upon the child and respondent (me)".
So I googled prejudicial.
prej·u·di·cial (pr
j
-d
sh
l)
Very interesting, shockedmum, I am glad you got a result you were happy with You obviously did really well in explaining the effects on you and particularly your little one.
I would like to add, just for putting the record straight, that there are also many, many applications to courts from parents without the main day to day care (mainly dads) which are made with sincere intentions and because the parent with care is behaving unreasonably. Obviously not you, shockedmum, but I often think that reading these boards on the topic, it could be surmised that that is rarely the case whereas that is much more usual than your circumstances.
What do you think will happen now, shocked mum, with regard to your child's dad?
I don't really know I have not really layed into him about what he did to me I only focussed on him having a healthy relationship with our child and my concerns and how it has impacted on the child.
I have showns that i was not there to score points by not even revealing a lot of things he did to me as i stated that i was only concerned about how he is with the child which i think made them take me very very serious as it was them who discovered the things he did to me and it must have been refreshing for them to have a non point scoring parent in court.
I have also proved it was him that destroyed my mental health and DESPITE THAT i have tried to arrange contact for him .
My childs father in prison atm nothing to do with me, it was something outside this court case.
he got sentence on my birthday LOL must have been karma since i had a great day.
Also His missus did him no favours tormenting me the way she did as she was the central piece of his case to help care for our child.
She was on camera chasing me around the school play ground calling my child ughly and that her kids were his real kids.
I personally as a MOTHER, Would want my child to have a healthy meaningfull relationship with her father. I would wish one day he will come out of the sick selfish evil condition he is in and reflect upon it with remorse, I would wish for that but not holding my breath and its really him having to prove those fears are no longer substantiated and he will get unsupervised access.
However atm i offered supervised access he just never took up the offer. The court are aware of it and its more then what they would have ever given him, I think they just wanted to give him writting access or something like non physical. The only reason i have done this is because I looked at the pro's and con's. And the Pro overweighed the possible con. As although my child states to hate her father and she did lay into him, i noticed those few visits put a spring in her step, her head was held up a little bit higher and she was subconsciously loving her dad had reached out to her. Even if she had not admitted it. and the court supported my offer saying my relatives are to supervise without me being there and can terminate access at any hint of abuse
I hate him, He ruined my life in ways unimagenable and i am still trying to fix it and learn from it.
but i can't change the past nor can anyone change her father soo there you go.
What happeneds next is really down to him when it comes to the child.
I think woman who do that themselfes are evil, you do not seperate parents for no good reason. they are too emotional and are putting their needs before the child.
I would love for my child to have a father she can trust and i can share respondsibilieties with and dump on him some of the load especially over the weekends lol sounds like heaven after having to have struggled as a single mother in abuse for years.
Thanks, shockedmum and high five to you that you tried to nurture their relationship despite everything. I often say on here that being a separated parent needs you to bite your tongue so hard sometimes that I am surprised mine has not got a DIY piercing
LOL That definately has occurred on occasions. The keep calm keep calm dont lash out moments lol
Ahh lets look on the bright side, I have matured quite a bit from being around suchs idiots lol.
I just want to rant for a min sorry.
Let it all out.
What is is With these men and their new partners joining in with the abuse?
ARE THEY NOT WOMEN THEMSELFES?
My child is his first child and SHE KNOWS THIS!!!!
So why chase me around and harrash me?
Why hate on me even existing and feel envy for my child?
You knew she was there before you starting popping out kids?
And what RIGHT does she have to meddle in MY LIFE!
Sometimes men are evil but these women are absolute idiots themselfes.
and then you have men whom want to rip the kids away from their mother how on EARTH do they find these women that are willing to comply?
What is attractive about that in spouse?
Thank god she got a right scolding from the Judge and in a more respectable manner basically got told to DO ONE! and worry about her own kids
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA
ok i am back to normal lol
Glad you got that off your chest 
I agree the behaviour is beyond comprehension. Sadly, we can't change other peoples' behaviour, only our own and how we react to others' behaviour. So hold your head high, shocked mum!!
Thank you louise :D
p.s sorry I can't remember where i read this but there was a case that I mentioned previously as you mention him getting your child to say something bad about your parenting this woman did this to a father and the court judged that she made it all up as these concerns didn't arise only during court hearings, she even went to a&e's and told doctors he hit her and she was gathering evidence. They look tru all sorts of files courts do and even interviewed the doctor and the courts deemed her behaviour as parental alienation and that this is emotional child abuse and that the child should not have to be subjugated to parental feuds and gave residency to the father.
I will try find it However i am not promising tc and stay positive.