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Hi,
I was very hesitant to come on here, but I am getting very desperate...
My 14-soon-to-be-15 year old is totally out of control. He has lost all respect for me, the house, his siblings. He ignores what I say, and what I ask him to do. He has been caught smoking, drinking and I know he has tried weed at least once. He has also been in trouble at school (they were helpful and offered counselling, but he did not go). When confronted he will run away or lash out (there are 3 broken doors in my house, and he has hit me in the face once). He runs with a very bad crowd and his grades are slipping.
Within all this he is very unhappy in himself. Half of me wants to lock him up and throw away the key, while the other half is heartbroken because he is so unhappy.
He has a lot of unresolved anger - my first husband (the children's father) was physically abusive to me - which I would not tolerate and therefore he left. He has broken off all contact with the children. My second husband became their Dad, but sadly he died of cancer.
How do I regain control?
I can't force him to counselling - he had to go to the doctor's recently and said noone could stop him from walking out. I try to get him away from those 'friends' as much as possible, but it is difficult as if I forbid it totally, he'll ignore me totally. I pretend I let him stay out longer when I am unable to police his whereabouts, and get him home earlier when I can. This seems to be working sometimes.
What can I do?
Sorry for the long ramble, but I could really do with some ideas!
Hello Hopeful
First of all I am glad you did decide to come on here, it is anonymous and yet very friendly and supportive. Secondly please aceept my sympathies on the sad loss of your partner. I echo what Bubblegum has said: you are definitely not alone!!! It's no easy feat bringing up a teen boy as a single mum, my boys are 21 and 16 now so I have some empathy with what you are going through. It is tempting when they are being so awful, to think that it is your fault or you are a bad parent. That is NOT the case; many boys of this age are very difficult to cope with, but you have totally hit the nail on the head when you say "regain control".
Got a few questions if you don't mind: is he the oldest child and how old are the others? How long ago would you say his behaviour crossed the line? When did his stepdad die? And how are YOU in all of this with your bereavement and survivorship of domestic violence? wow Hopeful you have been through a lot, I take my hat off to you 
and you are right, he is desperately unhappy and needs you to guide him back so that HE is also in control.
I have got a number of ideas that could help but just wanted to know more about the situation before I jump in, so that we get the best package of suggestions together for you. Please do stick with us as we have lots of input for you, there is no overnight answer but I hope now you know we are "on side" with you and will help you all we can.
Hi Louise,
thanks for the encouragement! You are right, I feel very guilty and ashamed (especially about the hitting incident), and I know I shouldn't, but I think it's an inbuilt mother-thing!
I'll try to answer your questions in order: I have four children all together: 3 boys and 1 girl. The oldest is 22 and lives near uni where he's doing a master's degree. (a teacher said to me when I was struggling with the second one: 'you got him alright, so there's no reason the next one should be any different. That was fantastic encouragement!). The second boy is 16 and has just taken his GCSEs. He went through a really bad phase the last couple of years - didn't want to do anything and had no interest at all, so his grades went down really badly. He started to wake up around Jan and did some work, so hopefully he's done enough to stay for A-levels! He's a lot friendlier now and a lot more helpful. He thinks son no. 3 is 'an idiot'.
Son number 3 is who we're talking about. He is the one who struggled the most about letting his stepdad into his life, but when he did, it was full heartedly, so I think the death hit him very hard and he feels quite abandoned. The trouble started about half a year ago, I think, when he started hanging out with a very troubled friend more, who lives in a very 'deprived' area of town, where most of the teens smoke/drink etc, and the corner shop thinks nothing of supporting that habit. I told him I was worried about the environment, but he denied (very believably) that he did things like that. He started being rude to teachers and more interruptive in class (he doesn't like sitting still anyway, so we've had an ongoing struggle since he started secondary school), but school never told me how bad it had got, not even at parents evening. His end-of-year report is horrible, and he says the last one was worse (I didn't get to see that - he said he didn't get one, and the school kept promising to send one in the post, but it never came).
My daughter is 13 tomorrow and mostly sweet - although she also has some teenage strop moments.
My husband died 3 years ago, after one year of illness. I was working fulltime and looking after everyone - work was very supportive until he died, but after half a year my line manager wanted a meeting with HR because my work had 'not been to a good standard for the last 6 months'. She was also overheard saying 'i don't know why she's like this; it's not like they've been married for 50 years'. So I decided to leave work and take a year out to give myself some time. This was good for all of us.
Since April last year I am studying adult nursing (something I wanted since I left school - another long story) and I am loving the course. It means of course that I am away for long shifts sometimes - this bit doesn't help - but I think overall the children are supportive of this.
I am mostly fine, I have a fantastic friends support network (although no family - my mum lives abroad) although the ones I have told about this particular problem don't really know what to do either! Some have suggested sending him to live with my mum, but then I'd be the third person to abandon him, and that just is not a good idea. I do still miss my husband - just having someone to sound off to after the day is done would be good - but most of the time I am ok.
Phew what a long waffle - sorry! Any more questions, just ask.
Oh - we're going to stay with my mum for 3 weeks in the holidays - change of scenery will be good for him. AND my oldest talked to him recently, and I think he got talked back to, so that's a step in the right direction, too.
@ Bubblegum: thanks for the moral support!
Good morning
I too I'm afraid can offer moral support and say how helpful everyone on here has been for me. I admire your continued strength and feel sure that with the advice and support of people on here you will get through this difficult time with your son.
Best wishes to you and all your family
Hi Hopeful. Just wanted to welcome you along. I have an 8 year old, so like some others, I don't have the experience of teenage years yet. Stay strong, your other children turned out ok in the end, so there's light at the end of the tunnel for this son. xx
Hello Hopeful
Thanks for the extra info, it really helps when we are thinking about support we can give you.
What you went through three years ago was dreadful and to have that attitude from employers, well I am not allowed by the rules of this board to type out what I said when I read that bit! 
Ok so you have two older boys, the second boy sounds as if he has just "turned the corner", which is a relief for you.
Anything I suggest to you is not at all meant as a criticism of you as a parent, just to help you, I think you have done a fantastic job, but I was wondering with your course and busy life whether your boy ever gets the chance of some one-to-one time with you. Now, when they are "in that mindset" personally I used to find it difficlut to think of this but.....BUT....I am guessing that as his behaviour has deteriorated, so many of the things that are said to him are negative (understandbly!). Secondly. teenagers actually love boundaries. They want to experiment but they need to feel safe and our job as parents is to draw that line: so far and no further.
With all that in mind, here is my suggested action plan:
1. Say to your boy it would be nice to spend some time together just the two of you, ask him what he would like to do in this time. If he won't do this, you will have to engineer it...you giving him a lift in the car, you doing the pots together. During the time together stay calm and pleasant, don't allude to the bad behaviour and at the end say "thank you, I really enjoyed spending time with you, you XXXX "(eg have a good sense of humour/are fun to be with/are so thoughtful/ are really interesting. Continue to ask to spend this time or engineer situations when you can be together. Praise whenever and whatever you can. Build your relationship together sufficiently so that you can say to him "I understand you don't want to see a counsellor and no-one is forcing you. You seem to me to be very angry about things and still sad about your stepdad's death and it will help to talk about it, that's all, it won't upset ME if you talk to me you know, I love you very much"
2. Whilst it is clear to you and I that the friend's influence is not good, banning won't work. However you CAN put in place rules that you expect your boy to respect. Ignore the smoking/drinking thing for now and just think about what motivates him in terms of rewards or privileges withdrawn. Once you have done number 1 for a couple of weeks, write down the rules, eg "You are expected to be home by the time agreed" and "you are expected to attend school every day", "you will not damage other people's property" and anything else similar (do not mention the friend or the smoking/drinking).
Underneath the rules draw up a grid with several stages in it (like rungs on a ladder) on the top rung write a mild sanction such as No X box for 48 hours, and on each subsequent rung make the sanction stiffer. You can have as many rungs as you like. My grid for my boy had eight and by the time we got to the bottom rung, I could not think of anything else so as a joke I wrote "crucifixion", which then became a massive family joke 
Anyway you can then talk to your boy and say you are concened about his behaviour and so you want to go through the rules with him and explain the consequences of not keeping to the rules. As I am sure you can guess, first offence moves him to stage one of the grid, further misdemeanours to a lower rung. Once in place this system can be used as a deterrent eg "I have asked you not to do X. If you persisit I will have to put you on stage two of the grid" the key is STAY CALM AT ALL COSTS.
4. Finally please get hold of a copy of one of my favourite books, click here to see it. The used copies are very cheap.
Hope this is of some help, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!!
Hi Hopeful
I'm so sorry you're going through all of this, and hope we can give you some support.
Hi,
finding alone time is not a problem for me, but for him as he prefers the friends' company. He likes fishing (why???) and I've asked him to take me one day and show me, so I'm planning that for next week.
The sanction thing is a big problem: the only thing that really gets him is to ground him. He is not interested in computer, games consoles, tv. He is very sporty, but does not want to commit to anything. So my only sanction is grounding him. I will try to draw this chart thing, but the steps are really 1. be home early, 2. not go out 1 night, 3. not go out at the weekend. I can't ground him indefinitely because he'll just go anyway.
Right now he's awol since 6 last night. He wanted to go camping, which in principle was ok, but he was to ask me and wait for my reply before he went (I had a lecture in the afternoon, and he wasn't quite sure that he was going because of the weather). During the lecture I had a text from him (very cheerful including smiley face and everything) saying he was going camping and would be home early in the morning. a - NOT what we had agreed - I didn't get the chance to say yes or no. b - he's still not home - I have sent text to a couple of friends to send him home asap, but he's not here yet. So really, I want him to stay home the rest of today when he eventually turns up. However, I've already told him he's coming to a bbq at my friends with everyone tomorrow, which is his holy saturday and he's already miffed about that.
I am finding it very hard to let bad behaviour go - especially as it's unfair on the other two who are starting to grumble. And staying calm is soooooooo difficult when really I want to take his head off!
I am well aware that banning the friends won't work - been there myself with my own parents.
Will order 'your' book.....
I do sometimes feel guilty about the studying, but I NEED to do somthing for myself, too. I love my course and if I had to stop it because of my son, I would resent him for ruining my life as well as potentially his own - even though this would be my own decision. 
Am very up and down with it all! x
Wow, what another long waffle. Sorry about that.
Thanks to everyone's supportive messages!
Hi hopeful, what a difficult time your whole family is going through. Louise has given some excellent suggestions.
May I make a couple too? You mention that he is sporty, but he won't commit to anything. What is it he likes?
You mention fishing, that would be great if he will let you go along. I think that you are not deeply enamoured by this idea, however, he will like it that you are there. Spending quality time with your son, is SO important, even though you might be doing something you don't enjoy.
Google 'Connexions' and your area, they have lots of activities for young people. I wonder if you can find some things going on in your area, he still needs your encouragement to participate in something.
Young Minds is an excellent organisation that we work with and they endeavour to improve the emotional wellbeing of young people and empower their parents. They have a free helpline Mon - Fri 9.30 - 4pm 0808 802 5544 and an excellent website.
I think we all recognise how easy it is to bite our childs head off when they have stressed us out and not listened. But by doing this we are showing them that we are losing control. And your son needs to know that you are in control. At the moment he is pushing all your boundaries and your buttons and he needs to be reeled in firmly yet fairly.
Don't feel guilty about your studying, you are absolutely right, you need something for you and by continuing you are setting a good example to all your children.
If your boy isn't bothered by the XBox being banned, what about his mobile when he is at home, or does he get an allowance? Does he do chores around the house?
And by the way, keep waffling! That's what we're here for!
Hi Anna,
will check the websites in a bit - it's really difficult to get him to go to anything he always throws up objections, but I will look and try.
He really likes rugby, but wants to play the matches without going to regular training. He did gymnastics when he was about 9 and very quickly was asked to go to competitions and thus stopped going. Then he went to athletics, again was asked to race for the club - and stopped going.
He has not got a working mobile - that way I can't contact him when he's out and about.
On the chore front, we have a rota for washing up/cooking/drying up which sometimes works and sometimes doesn't. They all do their own washing. Other chores get paid at £ 3 / hour of proper housework. He does that when he needs money.
I know I'm not keen on the fishing thing, but it was my idea to go with him and he seems quite pleased about that, so will have a good attitude, I promise!
btw: he has turned up. Had a really 'good' explanation why he did what he did, had a shower and is out again - wanted to stay out overnight, but accepted my no, negotiated home time (too late for my liking, too early for his) and I KEPT CALM.
I find it difficult to trust him because he lied so much about smoking/drinking/drugs. I have explained to him the more he shows me I can trust him the more freedom he gains. Not sure he understands that concept....
Thanks for bearing with me!
Hi Hopeful
No, do not feel guilty about the studying, you are entitled to pursue your dream and that does not mean you cannot be a mum, your dream is not "go and live on the moon for three years"
WELL DONE on keeping calm chatting to him, wow it is sooooooo hard I know that well but I promise you it is one of our most effecive tools when dealing with a teen. One day at a time as well!!
Stay with us, we will be with you all the way
Well, I came home from a bbq and he was asleep on the sofa, can't really rouse him and he has eyes like saucers. Maybe from camping last night and being tired, maybe from something worse. Big big sigh.
Also, the older brother had a strop, because I said tomorrow's lunch at a friend's house is a family thing and said no 3 son gets away with everything (which is kind of right, but how to explain to a 16 year old why?). Son no 2 wants to go out with friends, not go to the bbq. Was too tired to argue and said ok although it means I'll have another argument with son no 3. Even bigger sigh.
Thank you for your support though, I do feel 'understood'!
Son no3 not arguing, but very tearful - and tired. Asked whether he'd have to walk home from my friends' house (he seems to think he's going out tonight although I've not talked to him about that). That walk would take him an hour or so, ha!
Feel v tired and fed up that everything is such a struggle.
It can be tiring though, reasoning with the children.
Yes it is a long haul, I will be honest with you. I reckon parenting is the hardest job in the world. The book you have ordered will help with that, not that it contains energy tablets (!) but it sort of explains things in a different way that is a great help to parents, I think. Stay as calm as you can
I hope you manage to enjoy the BBQ. Deep breaths!!!
Hi Hello,
I was going to suggest maybe getting a appointment for CAHMS, you can self refer and the first appointment is talking through what the problems are, parents can be present or the child can do this by themself, then they decide whether they can offer further sessions, these are usually held out of school so your son may go although you said he didnt go to the councilling offered in school. The other thing that might be worth looking into is if you have a local Connexions, these offer councilling, careers advice, its worth looking into to see if they do courses, maybe after school or weekends that your son may be interested in eg mechanics, this would give him something to focus on, how about a local boxing club, this would teach him self discipline, hope this helps :)
The afternoon went thus: Son no2 went off to wherever he wanted to go. This got son no3 very tearful and upset. He got in the car with me and daughter, but when we got to my friends' he refused to get out of the car and eventually got out and walked off. He walked home - took him an hour and a half. I just wanted to cry at my friend's, but my daugher was there, so I fought it. Luckily my friend has been through the same sort of thing with her oldest who is now 22 and only just getting his act together.
son no3 rang from home when he got there, and I told him (calmly!) that he was grounded tomorrow, so he put the phone down. I just got home - he's watching telly and the board in the hall tells me 'gone for a bike ride on my own'. This is kind of good, because it shows me that he appreciates that I worry about who he hangs out with.
In the meantime, my friend's oldest whose girlfriend lives in the 'bad area' that my son's 'friends' do, told me that my son's best friend's dad buys his son crates of beer. Can I report that to social services or something? I am finding this really outrageous. I understand that some parents would let their 14 year olds have an occasional drink (my parents did me), but to let them have a steady supply?
Still feel like crying, am so worn out. Will ring parentline tonight, or tomorrow.
Claire, I will look at connexions, I think someone else has mentioned this, too, but there is no way he would go to anything that even remotely sounds like counselling. The mechanics thing might be an idea, if there's something like that in our area.
Thanks to everyone for helping me think!
I would also find it outrageous. What on earth are parents thinking of?
I think you are doing really well by keeping your cool. When is your fishing trip with your son?
That's something I just can't get my head around!
I keep typing and deleting, I'm afraid Hopeful. I think my brain's frazzled this evening.
I do hope that you and your daughter enjoyed the BBQ though. I'm just sorry your son didn't feel able to join in.
Hi Hopeful
Your message made me think that your son's one and half hour walk on his own, did him some good, gave him some time to think. Maybe you could do that more often! Drive him to the middle of nowhere and then let him out to walk back 
I am glad that your friend has understanding and hopefully words of wisdom regarding dealing with and getting through those difficult male teenage years.
It is against the law for an adult to buy alcohol on the behalf of someone under 18. I think a lot of parents do, but 'crates of it' sounds an awful lot. Could you ask your son about this?
In a light way of course! Just say you heard about it and wondered if it is true and what does he think about it as it must cost the dad a fortune. When he is a father would he buy crates of alcohol for his 14/15 year old? It might open up an interesting conversation, just remember to keep any of your own opinions light!
Hi,
he was very tearful last night when I got in and even apologised. I said he still wasn't going out today, and last night he was ok with that. However, this morning he did tons of housework (he did owe me some hours for pocket money a few days ago) and has now asked that he go out.
I've said no, because the deal was he's not because of yesterday. Now he's being very aggressive and slaming doors and kicking things. His friends rang several times (they want him to come and have a bbq with them) and he's refusing to pick up the phone. When I picked it up, he came and took it off me and put it down again. He's still smashing up stuff in his room, I dread to think what it will be like when he calms down. He says now I am out of order because he was 'nice to everyone all day'.
I am exhausted and really just want to cry.
My daughter is upset and says just let him go, at least then there's peace here.
I am very tempted to, but I know it's wrong.
P.s: fishing is on thursday, if he still wants to.
He's still punching walls and stuff. The house is only rented and I really don't know what to do!
Oh hopeful. It must be an awful atmosphere there. Yes it would be sooo easy to give in and let him go out, but then that says to him, 'kick up a stink, trash your room, and you can go out'. No matter how hard it is, you have to stand your ground. Can you go in the garden for a break, so you're not listening to the noise? Once he's calmed down, perhaps he'll be willing to have a chat? Don't be tempted to go in his room either, give him the space he needs right now.
So. His bedroom door has a hole in it. Son no2 trying to fix it, but don't know, if he can.
Son no3 has gone off on his bike - after some serious negotiation and him saying he just doesn't want to be inside. He promised not to see his mates, he just wanted to be by himself. I've told him to be back by 5, fingers crossed.
He said I was always making him sad, and I said I am not responsible for how he chooses to behave and he said he can't control his behaviour. This is probably true, but he has to learn.
Hope your son returned on time. As for the door, I would have made him sort it. It was his responsiblity, not your older ones. I know it is hard, but if it is seen that he is getting away with things, he will just carry on doing it, knowing that there aren't any consequences. You're right, you aren't responsible for his behaviour, so if he can't control it, does he behave like this outside of the house? I do hope you get a peaceful evening Hopeful. You deserve it after the weekend that you've had. xx
Son no3 was back quarter of an hour early in a much better temper. Agreed we need to make some rules, but is probably rethinking that as I type.
I didn't make anybody fix the door. No2 offered, and as he is only just coming out of the teenage stupor, I wasn't about to stop him. As it happens he couldn't fix it anyway.
No3 does not behave as bad as this outside the house. However, when he has misbehaved in class (big big sigh) and the teacher confronts him about it at the end of the lesson, he will just walk away and even leave school premises.
Wanted to ring parentline, alas they are of course only there 9 - 4 on weekdays, so that's going to happen Wednesday the earliest. Might just do a copy and paste of what I've put here and email them. Too tired to think now.
Hope parentline can help.
Hi Hopeful
I am so pleased to read that Son no3 came home early and in a better temper.
It sounds as though he had an 'its not fair tantrum'. I havwe to admit I used to have those at his age. I really felt that my mum had no idea what my life was like AND they were trying to control me!
A discussion and rules is really important, have a read of some of our articles in the Teenagers section. Especially Parenting Teens, 5 Tips for Dealing with a Disrespectful Teen and Family Contract.
I am really glad that you have son no2 around, it sounds as though he did his best to fix the door, do you know think you will have to get a new one?
Parentline is provided by Family Lives and their website says that it has a 24 hour confidential helpline on 0808 800 2222, it is their live chat service that is 9 -4 on weekdays :)
How is your son today? Is he up yet? Are you studying today or are you able to enjoy the holidays? When do you go on holiday?
Oh Hopeful. What an awful time you had with him. I do hope he's calmer today. Fair play to son no 2 for trying to sort out the door.
I know I keep saying it, but I am sorry you're having to deal with this.
I do hope you do have some quiet time. xx
Thanks for all the links Anna, and thanks for everyone's support! Makes me feel not so alone.
Feel exhausted still from the weekend, but hey. Still got tomorrow and Wednesday at uni and one little exam next week, then I'm done till September (although, of course, I'll have to do revision and assignments and stuff, but it's not so rigid timewise).
Son no3 was sweet as pie this morning, even brought me coffee in bed. I've come back from uni to an empty house - really nice that, because I'll sleep for an hour before everyone comes back! Tomorrow is my daughter's 13th birthday, so son no1 and girlfriend will be here, too.
Big hugs to you all! x
Hope your daughter has a lovely Birthday. Did you get your nap before they returned home?
I hope that your daughter has a lovely birthday. I hope you all get to enjoy her day.
Yes, did have nap!
Son no3 staying over at friend's house tonight. Asked him about that dad buying drinks for his son, but was told the dad hates the son's behaviour as much as I do, so he wouldn't.
Just been out to buy birthday cake... bedtime now!
Hugs to all and thanks for being there!
Have a lovely day, and a Big Happy 13th to your daughter. Enjoy the cake. xx
Happy 13th Birthday to your daughter and also to you!!! 
Thats good to know about the other parent. Quite funny that he says his mates dad hates his behaviour as much as you do!!
Would you consider meeting the dad? Either going to theirs, or inviting them over to yours? By doing this the children will see that they can't hold secrets because 'the parents' know each other?
What time is everyone coming round today?
Finished early at uni, so able to be home and spend time with daughter! Son No2 and daughter sitting at the bottome of my bed as I type.
Going to make a cake with daughter now.
Getting the other two about 6-ish because daughter wants kfc for dinner (whoever's birthday it is can choose dinner - family tradition) and we need to get that.
Good times
Have a brilliant day, and best wishes to your daughter for a happy birthday.
Thanks for all the birthday wishes! She had a good time (at least she said she did!), and there were no major arguements.
Son no1 told no3 it was not a good idea to smash in doors (don't know what the reply was, but no3 wasn't in a worse mood after, so I guess it was ok).
No2 goin to see the girlfriend (who he's told me he won't be bringing home ever, lol) later, no3 going camping over night, daughter going swimming today.
Fishing trip with no3 tomorrow - i'll have to have words with him before he takes off today, that i don't want to go, if he's all tired and miserable.....
Hi Hopeful, I am glad that you all had a good birthday. Its great that your eldest son is having words with your youngest son. Hopefully this will sink in slowly.
Might I suggest that you don't say anything negative to your son before going fishing, rather you could say - I am really looking forward to going fishing with you tomorrow and learning all about it.
This is creating a positive atmosphere. Rather than putting a dampener on him. He might well be a bit tired and miserable tomorrow morning after camping, but if he knows there is pressure on him, it might make him more grumpy, rather than pull himself out of it to show you a good time.
Just an idea, but imagine someone you love saying that to you, when you are going to share your hobby with them.
It sounds like a busy day today for you with everyone in and out. Will you and your daughter get to have a girly evening tonight, if all the boys are out?
I'm glad she enjoyed her birthday.
Good luck with the fishing tomorrow. I hope all will be calm and sunny - and not necessarily the weather...
Lol, Anna, do you mean just about fishing? 
I won't say anything bad about that, he seems so pleased that we're doing this. He even suggested I bring a book in case I get bored from catching too many!
He was in a very good mood today - even complimented his younger sister on her hair!
Hoping for good weather now!
Thinking about asking the other dad to meet up....
Enjoy the fishing Hopeful. Will you be bringing home your catch and cooking it? 
Glad your son is in a better mood. Long may it last
Hi Hazeleyes, thanks, I'm determined it will be a good time! I don't think you're allowed to eat what you catch, but you have to throw it back in the lake....
Thats great that he complimented his sister! Pretty rare for a lad his age!!
Happy fishing tomorrow if we don't 'see' you, great advice by the way, do you have a good book? And a thermos? Actually sounds rather nice, if the weather isn't too bad, might be quite relaxing hanging out in the fresh air :)
Is the other dad married? It might be better to get in touch with the mum!
Oh, Anna, don't get me started on the family of that poor boy!
His parents split up (about 18 months ago), he stayed with dad, then moved to nan, then moved to mum, then moved to dad, the moved to nan again, then moved with dad to council housing (v bad estate), then mum came back, now mum has left again. I think the mum has some mental health problems, too (from what my son says, she often seems confused?). The boy has been expelled from the school my son still goes to and now has to go on a train to the next town. If I wasn't so wrapped up in my own problems at the moment I would make him my project!
Have plenty of good books, thanks - love a good thriller plus 'your' book is here, too, started reading last night. Weather forecast says sunny and 25! Thermos was a good reminder!
I do hope you have fun tomorrow. I'm afraid I'd be reading the book! So pleased the fish get to go back in the lake - I'm just too soft.
Happy Fishing. xx
Doesn't look like the fishing will take place today :-(
No3 not back from camping yet. They are relying on abovementioned mother for pickup, so it's whenvery she gets her act together. The weather is not so nice either, although it's not raining (yet).
Will swap the fishing with shopping trip with daughter tomorrow, me thinks. If he's not home by eleven. Think that's reasonable, and he knows it's an option....
Big sigh x
Hope everyone else has a nice/productive/positive day!
Hello :)
I can't realy help you, my children are six and seven, I've not got to the teenage years yet, not experienced the problems you are and I don't suppose the time out stairs and threats of no sweets will work with fifteen year olds, I just wanted to say hello.
There are lots of helpfull people on here and they will be along shortly with good advice.
I just wanted to say that you are not alone, these sort of issues seem to come up often on here.
Take care : )