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hi anoyymous mum how are u today, really ope ur ok, im thinkin of uxx
got so much to do today to prepare for tommorow, got to walk like 5 miles cos im so skint got to go libary and the other stuff got no energy , wont be able to sleep tonight feel so weak x
aw hun wish i cud go court with u, i walk alot cos dont want pay for buses,im avin drivin lessons tho now,i always get so anxious bfore courtm,avnt these men put us thru enuff eh, they dont care at all,xx try relax hunxx
I agree Kiera, it doesn't seem to stop I don't understand why he won't give up this long after iv left,
yeah I ignore him etc I'm stronger but he's really effecting us and there's nothing I can do about it it stinks.
i am seriously considering a move away seems the only option I have x
hows everyone doing today?
hi hun well thts what im serously considerin movin away. last hearin in august,so i got year breathin space while he does the work , if he does, doubt it, dont want him knowin where i live but i am scared to move, my eldest doesnt want to. pluis he as exams,and my other son starts big school in sept, its hardx
Hi kiera I can understand you wanting to move, but as I was told, they can always find us if they want to. kiera whilst your son is doing his exams he needs stability and your other son also needs stability as he goes into the bigger world of senior school. YOu have been through the worst, you do not need to run away. Move by all means but for your own reasons, work, family, but don't do it to get away from ex.
IDT it sounds as though things are tough still for you with regards to ex. Are you still writing everything down? I hope so.
A move away is something to consider after the worst is over court dates etc and the dust settles ... Def not in haste
its a huge thing isn't it
yes I keep a diary he won't give up I didn't expect this
i hope all goes well tomorrow anonymousmum
hi anoymous how are u hun, im thinkin of u, ope tomoz goes ok, b strong hunxx
moring anoymous how are u, ope u av slept,im thinkon of u in court today, b strong hun, dont look at him, luk at the judge,it wil b over with soon, court i mean,xx
Hi anonymousmum, I meant to wish you well on yesterdays message, I hope it all went ok, let us know.
IDT, has the levels of 'bothering' increased? Are you still in touch with any professionals who know about your case?
Waving to kiera too!
hi everyone ,well it got adjourned the magistrates said it was to complex for them to deal with cos of the allegations and denial made by ex , they have said with him already completing a domestic violence perpatrators course and then reoffending it is quite an unusual case and have referd it over to a high court judge , he has to write another staemnet but i dont? he is now respojding to allegations , back again next month for a case management hearing and then will get the date for fact finding in front of the high court judge x
How do you feel about it anonymous mum xx
are you reasonably happy with how it went today ?
hi Kiera
what you got planned for weekend?
weathers loooovley here !
anna I will write on my thread about things x
hi imdoingthis no im not happy that i got me self so worked up for today like really siked me self up for it just to be told it has to be done later , but am thinking mayby its better that its going to high court cos there taking the allegations so seriously, i a bit concerned that ex gets to ewtrite another statement now to , and hes been publicly saying around that court went well today wich i dont get cos for him it didnt unless he,s got something up his sleve, i asked my solicitor should i do anything else or gater any more evidence and he said no he thought i had enough x
the magistrates told the solicitors that the allegations are extremley serious as i was pregnant with lil one and today could of resulted in no contact so if today had gone ahead then it may have all been over , but its like there giving him another chance to lie even more , they obviously seen my evidence x
I'm sorry things are still ongoing anonymousmum. I really am...
i know hun me to ..all this just seems to be making chaos of the most special years with lil one x
hi anoymous how are u, so u av another hearin, hate it when its adjournedx
Yes I understand your 'let down' of today it's almost cruel
i feel positives from your post that's why I asked you how you felt about it, and I think it will be better outcome for you in the long run...
I know waiting .. Another court date bla bla im sure it is in your interest honey
i hope so , it just disturbs me a bit that he seems to think it went in HIS favour , and it could of been no contact orderd today , i was soooo nervous when i got there and waited a few hours got my self a bit calmer and ready to go in then bam ..its not happning x
hi anoymous how are u todayx
Iv been there anonymusmum its horrid because your all ready built yourself uthe long term I'm sure it will work out better though
have you got a new court date yet?
hi feel down tonyt, and feel alone, my son ad another siezure tonyt, i feel awful cos i didnt hear him avin a siezure, my little girl ad smasged the lava lamp, glass everywhere,my youngest son shouted tht he was on the floor, he was really dazed, im just sitin ere thinkin god i feel alone, i dotn normal feel like tht, sorry just feel down
HI Kiera
how you feeling now
I do feel alone too when my son fits I think it's cos I'm the only adult here and all the responsabilulitys on me it's not a nice feeling Hun
hugs x
Hi kiera,
How are you doing this morning?
You have such a lot on your plate - don't be too hard on yourself for not hearing your son last night. I hope he slept well and has come out of the other side of his seizure ok.
Hi kiera, big hugs, thinking of you today, we all get moments when we feel so completely alone. You are doing a grand job, be kind to yourself. 
Hay honey a what u up to tonight ?
hi well my son as ad siezure at school today on the sports field, he ad siezure 8th july,like they becumin regular now, feel like cryin, my son is fine its me thts upsetx
It's worrying when it keeps happening to him, kiera. When are you due back at the specialist?
Hi kiera, sorry to hear that x
hi well court next wednesday, last hearing, cafacss recomendations very good, stil bit worrying cos hope the judges wil go along wht cafac ss recomedations,spoke to cafacss he said hes sure judges will,bit worried cos hear stories men tht do tht perpertartor programe but stil avnt changed, its all a front when they are doin tht programme, what if he sails thru all tht work he as to do but asnt change thenj he gets access, i no i shudnt think like tht, then im worried botu goin court on my own, worried wot ex will do, x
HI kiera, it is understandable that you are beginning to feel anxious again about going to court. However remember how he behaved last time, he was all manners. Then he tried to give you killer looks.
This information is now power for you to hold on to. I have mixed feelings about the perpetrator programme, however we have to see if he will attend all the sessions before worrying what comes after that.
Be gentle with yourself in the upcoming week. Is there really no-one that could go to court with you?
hi im gonma ring wave today and see if lady there who i did my sessions with can cum wiht me, i wud feel safer, bit paranoid as its last hearing, wot my ex myt dox
Hi hope she can go with you Hun x
Hi kiera, what did Wave say? From what you said about the last visit that you had in court, it all went pretty smoothly. I think you need to remind yourself of that.
Yes it will be nerve wracking and yes he gives the evil eye, however you really have the upper hand here.
hi yes lady from wave gona cum with me, so feel better, x
Great news xx
That is brilliant news kiera, hopefully that will allay your fears that he might attempt to ambush you after court?
Hiya guys i just seen this thread,
Kiera oh my gosh you seem to have been through so much.
I am not surprised you feel anxious.
I haven't read the whole thread but why is this guy taking you in an out of court can they not see this is in to detriment of your own health having to face that monster every time.
This is so horrible, I have not read the whole thread so i dont know if you already have been given this suggestion but can you not speak to your g.p. and explain all the effects this is having on you.
You shouldn't have to deal with this you should be able to just focus on healing and moving forward.
You are not a victom baby girl you are a survivor and an amazing one at that and its understandable how you are feeling.
I have been on anti deppressents for my anxiety and panick attacks and was reffered to the mental healths team for cognitive behavioral therapy.
I Dont understand if they say he is dangerous why are they keep making you go to court.
Scratching my head here!
hi anna do i sound silly bout bein worried bout ex after court. i read story of woman actually made plans for er funeral and er children cos of fear tht er ex wud kill er, she went court regardin er restranin order which she got granted, then when leavin he ambushed er and killed er, awful, she ad 2 small children, these men are unpredictable, he as already put me in hospital once so i no he is capablex
hi, my next court date is coming up next week for a case management hearing with judge, ex has now made serious allegations against me am really woried x
hi hun aw wot date, myn next wed, last hearing tho, god these men wil say anythin, they are evil, well dont b worried cos they arnt true but i no wot u mean u stil get worried dont u, i myt av to giv evidence but i can ava screen put up,aw try not to worry hunx
hi i no what u mean, he is dangerous but i suppose its procedure, it is last hearing next wed,and he isnt allowed any contact at allx
Hello anonymousmum, sorry to hear your news, what day is your hearing? I expect with a case management hearing, the judge will decide on the format of the proceedings to come and set dates and ask for any documents/reports etc to be produced by certain dates. Your ex was bound to make allegations against you as am attempt at defence. Try to concentrate on YOUR side of things rather than what he is saying and remember always to keep the focus of what you do and say to be the good of your child, I know we have spoken about this before but worth saying again
Hi kiera, it is sensible to be wary and you have taken a big step in getting someone to go with you. You KNOW you can do this, you have been through this process before with another of your exes and you know the system, let's hope this is the last time you ever have to face something like this, you must be sick of the sight of courtrooms!
hi yes court tomoz, yes i can get thru tomoz, god i went court last 2 times on my own, i myt av to giv evidence, mainly just my ex and caffcass who are spkin in court, but i can av screen up if i do get called,i av room booked again,its just 3 hour hearing,cafacss told me not to worry,and he cant see judge goin against his final recomendations,so im not worrying,x
it as been a long year, yes i am sick of court rooms,but my ex asnt got what he set out to do,so to all ui women on here these men dont always get what they want,x
Hi hun
not long now to wait till its over
x x
hi hun how are u, when is ur court date,hope ur okx
Hello anonymous mum, your court date is here, I am not surprised you have lost weight with all the anxiety, in one sense I am glad it is here because the waiting is so hard, we will all be thinking of you tomorrow